54. Veracity 0-0 vs. 55. trapezoidal 0-0

This is a discussion on 54. Veracity 0-0 vs. 55. trapezoidal 0-0 within the RapMusic's Storytelling League forums, part of the Text Battle Leagues category; VERSES DUE Wednesday 10:00pm PACIFIC/1:00am EST VOTES DUE Saturday 10:00am PACIFIC/1:00pm EST Choose 1 topic here: http://board.rapmusic.com/showthread...hreadid=597386 and write your ...


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Old 07-05-2003, 07:54 PM   #1 (permalink)
O Luh Da Kids
 
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Omen takes it up the butt!
54. Veracity 0-0 vs. 55. trapezoidal 0-0






VERSES DUE Wednesday 10:00pm PACIFIC/1:00am EST
VOTES DUE Saturday 10:00am PACIFIC/1:00pm EST


Choose 1 topic here:
RSTL Topics !!!!

and write your story for your match in this thread!


LINE LIMIT:
4 lines - NO SHOWS
16 lines - MINIMAL
52 lines - MAXIMAL


VOTING:
No crew votes
No payback votes
No 2nd Chance Votes


YOU MUST MUST MUST -- POST YOUR URL'S OF ALL THE BATTLES YOU VOTED ON HERE IN YOUR OWN THREAD..

VOTE ON 6 BATTLES!!!!!

FAILURE TO DO SO RESULTS IN 3 VOTE SUBTRACTION!!!


if you win by no-show u are encouraged to vote still in other matches!!!!!



GO FOR IT!!!
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Old 07-06-2003, 12:12 AM   #2 (permalink)
Ol' School
 
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Veracity takes it up the butt!
checkin in

g'luck
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Old 07-09-2003, 08:29 AM   #3 (permalink)
dip - the wonder years.
 
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trapezoidal. takes it up the butt!
in.

18. Abuse


never was, never will, never would be shit,
severed loves clever drills & i stood eclipsed,
overshadowed by figures slamming me 2 the earth,
over battles i quivered, bandaging wounds from birth,
mean-mugs, fuck nurses - my mom slapped me first,
seen blood & such curses, the draum mapped the worst,
no presents or friends ... a living cell was my crib,
dads presence - defends from fitting welts on my ribs,
the belt-buckle was harsh, branded on my ass his mark,
sometimes felt subtle sparks handed by my past remarks,
never had a black eye, no teachers could see my pain,
whether sad, i cracked smiles - a feature concealed by rain,
teardrops were insignificant, wonder why the feeling left,
fear, CLOCKED! "such an idiot!", slumber scared from his reeling left,
& uppercuts ... scars show revealing wounds,
they're re-opened whenever i think they're healing soon,
im supposed to be a mommas boy, not daddys whipping post,
so close to being so destroyed, my bodys stripping hope,
now i provoke, hoping one more punch is deaths door,
so i spoke ... holding my dying breath, he fell 2 the floor,
a tiny hole had shone through, peering into his soul,
mommy crumbled to her knees - holding the lives that she stole,
in one hand, her husband she killed with his .38 snub,
the other hand, her son she killed - never consoling or loved.
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Old 07-10-2003, 12:18 AM   #4 (permalink)
Jonny Punchline
 
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KonviKt takes it up the butt!KonviKt takes it up the butt!KonviKt takes it up the butt!
good luck you two


Last edited by KonviKt; 07-10-2003 at 12:25 AM.
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Old 07-10-2003, 01:02 AM   #5 (permalink)
Ol' School
 
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Veracity takes it up the butt!
13. Fear

What is fear? Fear is sweat dripping down your nose...
When it's cold and your whole damn body is froze...
From your forehead down to your feet and your toes...
Fear...is not knowing what everybody else knows...
Fear is ignorance and being left all alone in the dark...
Fear is like having a gap between ya home and ya heart...
Just emptiness...a black whole...deep with no ends...
Fear cripples you...everything...your feet and yo' hands..
No friends...no family...no where to hide from the pains...
When you can't beat the demons that hide in your brain...
It drives you insane...this shit just eats you alive inside...
To the point where you wish you would just die tonight...
Fear is something that every one has faced in our time...
All of those things that we place in the back of our minds...
Fear is real...but fear is also a figment of your imagination...
Fear comes in many shapes and sizes...translation...
Fear could be anything, even things you least expect....
Fear is looking at something you haven't beaten yet...
Fear is not spiders and high places...real fear is strange...
Fear is not knowing what makes you afraid of those things...
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Old 07-10-2003, 01:09 AM   #6 (permalink)
I love Mary jane
 
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MC ENFERNO takes it up the butt!
Man I dont even wann vote cause both verses were equal but I was feeling Trap's whole outline better made me feel for the kid

Vote: Trap
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Old 07-10-2003, 02:08 AM   #7 (permalink)
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Resilient. will do you doggie style!Resilient. will do you doggie style!Resilient. will do you doggie style!Resilient. will do you doggie style!Resilient. will do you doggie style!Resilient. will do you doggie style!Resilient. will do you doggie style!Resilient. will do you doggie style!Resilient. will do you doggie style!Resilient. will do you doggie style!Resilient. will do you doggie style!
.. ^ Over No Shows

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Old 07-10-2003, 08:40 AM   #8 (permalink)
shock aka solution
 
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Cocaine Charlie takes it up the butt!
vote: Trap

overrall better verse for me..the other guy tried doin what solution did with his 'tomorrow' topic a few weeks ago but it didnt really work..no twist..too ,many lines started with Fear..it only kept me focused because it was sshort..Trap came nice..i was feelin his verse..flow n multies was nice..it was pretty deep to..nice story..nice verse..
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Old 07-10-2003, 10:31 AM   #9 (permalink)
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kaszmo takes it up the butt!
vote: trap

Ima keep this short cus i got a hangover, lol

anyways trap got mad nice multis and a real good vocab, a nice flowin verse and good imaginary.. i loved his endin, kinda a shocker but real nicely written out.. Veracity u came good but i didnt really get into ur verse.. i liked the idea and u worked with it good but dunno Trap jus came iller to me
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Old 07-10-2003, 12:24 PM   #10 (permalink)
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iceheart takes it up the butt!
vote: trap

trap had better imagery and emotion in his verse, and he had a better vocabulary and used it better, and his just seemed to flow better to me

peace
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Old 07-10-2003, 02:52 PM   #11 (permalink)
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DahLohner takes it up the butt!
Meh..

Trap- Nice verse, your flow was off the chains for the first couple of lines, and you came with some interesting emotion, but the content lacked in my eyes, you could have made a stronger connection if you were going the 'story' way with your topic, ending was a bit strange and badly transitioned into.

Veracity- your verse was just as flowable as trap's, plus your outline was a bit better, you stuck to the topic, you could have done more, but the verse looks well thought out and from beginning to end it is cohesive and creative.

VOte-Veracity

IMOUT
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Old 07-11-2003, 01:34 AM   #12 (permalink)
Ol' School
 
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Veracity takes it up the butt!
blah..horrible votes...

1-4
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Old 07-11-2003, 02:14 AM   #13 (permalink)
Black Hand
 
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AuThoR NYSE takes it up the butt!
Trap - Nice verse.. flow was nice all the way through.. Content was good.. felt at times as if you were missin something in parts.. not a lot but like a minor detail.. it was good and I enjoyed the ending of your verse... multis were good.. nice word choice... All in all this was a very enjoyable read

Veracity - flow was good.. your content was nice.. I enjoyed what you came with .. I didn't however enjoy how you used the word Fear so much.. almost as if each line contained the word... but your verse was nicely written

This match comes down to personal preference I believe.. its a hard one to vote on.. both shined where the other was dim... But in the end I was feelin what Veracity had to offer more...I was just more drawn by what he had to say... Veracity barely took this one.. I'm talkin like barely by a pube hair.. shit was that close... I was just feelin what he brought more...

Vote - Veracity
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Old 07-11-2003, 02:32 AM   #14 (permalink)
Ol' School
 
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Veracity takes it up the butt!
thanks for voting

2-4

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Old 07-11-2003, 02:11 PM   #15 (permalink)
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Insanevillian REP THIS!Insanevillian REP THIS!Insanevillian REP THIS!Insanevillian REP THIS!Insanevillian REP THIS!Insanevillian REP THIS!Insanevillian REP THIS!Insanevillian REP THIS!Insanevillian REP THIS!Insanevillian REP THIS!Insanevillian REP THIS!
Quote:
Originally Posted by Veracity
thanks for voting

2-4

lol Konvikt couldnt help himself but post the KČ after he typed up his shit... it must be hard for him to keep an alias...

lol....

ill vote later...
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Old 07-11-2003, 03:59 PM   #16 (permalink)
Back up this bitch
 
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Creatical takes it up the butt!
lol - shouldn't of pointed it out, he might have voted for himself later on.

trap's was nice all the way through.. i only liked konvikt's closer..
vote - trap
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Old 07-11-2003, 04:43 PM   #17 (permalink)
Jonny Punchline
 
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KonviKt takes it up the butt!KonviKt takes it up the butt!KonviKt takes it up the butt!
I can keep an alias

But everybody already knows this one...

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Old 07-12-2003, 05:59 PM   #18 (permalink)
O Luh Da Kids
 
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Omen takes it up the butt!
Trap Wins 1-0

veracity Loss 0-1
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