4. Got Life? - (24) vs. 13. TeKneeK - (7) VOTE NOW!

[J o o k]

The New RSTL Rules and Regulations

VERSES DUE:Friday 11:59 pm EST. NO RECYCLING.

Verses posted after the deadline will not count! UNLESS you post your verse before mods close threads (for some odd reason), and your opponent agrees to let your verse stand.

VOTES DUE: Sunday 8 PM PST. 4 votes per participant, POST LINKS in your match. Each link not posted will result in a 1 vote deduction up to 4 votes obviously.

*Votes posted after deadline will not count in a tie or a close match, thus possibly resulting in a loss. GET YOUR VOTES IN.
You are also required to vote on the Championship, and Contendership match which will be included in your 4 votes.

If you are not in the league you cannot vote, unless you are an ex champion. Ex champions must vote on a minimum of 4 battles for their votes to count.

*Check-in (Posting in your match to show that you are aware the match exists) is encouraged but not required.

*Verses MUST incorporate at least one of the provided topics and must be at least 16 lines and must not exceed 64 lines.

*Anyone who does not post at least 4 lines, incorporating at least one of the provided topics, is considered a no-show.

*During check-in, you can ask your opponent to agree to a line limit (Minimum 16) and if your opponent agrees, Moderators will hold both participants to that limit.

*Posting between 4-15 lines is considered a no-show.

* EXSTENSTIONS will be granted on a case by case basis.

*If your opponent no shows you will still be held accountable for posting TWO VOTES.

*Votes must at least be 2 lines in length for each verse.

NO SHOWS WILL COUNT AS A LOSS.

Lastly: Moderators have FINAL say over all situations that arise.

Amendments

1. Mods can vote.

2. You're opponent automatically gets the same extension deadline.

3. You cannot win a championship by no show. You will become the number #1 seed, but you must win by vote to be a champion. This does not apply for defenses.

[TeKneeK]

*walks in...*


*walks out*

[Got Life?]

votes:

1. 5. Vada - (19) vs. 12. DaAlmightDolla - (7) VOTE NOW!
2. 3. Eye-Rime - (32) vs. 14. L Dogg - (5) VOTE NOW!
3. 6. Lucifa - (16) vs. 11. Trybz - (7) VOTE NOW!
4.

[TeKneeK]

.............................

[TeKneeK]

TOPIC: Murderous Immigrants

TO THE BEAT OF: "A minute to pray, a second to die" by SCARFACE


A true story of North Korea’s invasion along a local South Korean village in the Korean War…

Something told to me… personal ish..

It was a moment to gaze and a time made to suffer
A little boy cried without the help of his mother
Her and 3,000 peasants driven from their own homes
Left alone from their motherland to places unknown
Rooms were ransacked and chairs smashed with scattered debris
Shots were heard across the countryside and then there was me
In a small hidden hut along the edge of the ravine
Which the river flows across into the thick of the trees
My heart was pounding real fast full of terror and dread
I gasped at every gunshot that laid my own dead…
I recall the other night when that stranger came frantic
Bringing news of dreaded images while farmers left laughin
Without much that’s happened in the place where I lived
There was nothing much to fear but the life of our kids
And the life of our work in which the world was moving slow
And from what my parents told me, my kids will never know
But it showed when the soldiers came invading the plains
I remember it so vividly…. A downpouring rain
Came encumbered with a dark shade behind the deep hills
In which the clouds shaded grey became a storm filled with chills
Commonfolk ran panicked and delirious in state
They snatched their kids screaming making haste in escape
While most fled safely, others couldn’t be saved
And the many other people caught were taken away..

I remember sunny hills in the wake of the morn
When the skies were glowing faintly as a new day was born
Misty forms of lanky clouds and the greenery plains
Became obscure when that day brought unwelcome rain
It was pain within emotions that I sensed inside
All was lost when my eyes saw the many that died
I saw Uncle Soon cry at the top of the hill
On his knees askin why so many peasants were killed
Crops were trampled and drenched, all our animals maimed
What my life was before would never ever be same
News of soldiers out in combat were waiting up north
Stationed out in encampments waiting when to move forth
I walked the streets filled with blood and wagons sopped without grain
Dead men left in mud with elder folks necked in chains
It was a time of mental anguish; a picture drawn so insane
The torments people suffered and emotions left me drained
When a week surpassed this day when the agony ceased
I stood before my cousin’s grave screaming why there’s no peace…
But that didn’t help …..


So I looked to God in blame….

And told myself I’ll never smile when I wake up again.

[Got Life?]

extension requested for no more than 12 hours.

Thanks Tek....

[J o o k]

Tek since you posted a verse before Got asked for an extension.

It is up to you whether it be granted.

So as of now it's in Teks hands, unless he grants the time GL lost an ... ahem.. winnable battle.

[TeKneeK]

imma let him post.... i already got 2 wins by NS.... i wanna earn it... so he can post later.

[Got Life?]

Since school I sought to marry a woman or three,
Tempted by the possibility of how great it'd be,
Having one feed me, one blow me, one fix the TV,
Well maybe…But I never saw that we’d disagree,
But living under this roof with my jealous wives,
Has my constant paranoia keeping tabs on knives,
Because if one went astray, my mind would decay,
Steadily pacing, thinking which one would betray,
The trust that I oh so seldom convey,
I guess everything has it’s own cliché,

You see Liz was everything I ever wanted an more,
But the smirk she wore when the sex was hardcore,
Showed me the truth, of how her mind was at war,
Deciding whether she liked to constantly explore,
All these hidden taboos or would she one day choose,
That she refused to bruise and make some daily news,
Where she’d take her favorite paddle and strike,
Leaving my corpse slouched naked over a bike,
As she’d roll me down the hill that our house rests upon,
But when she looks in my eyes, that thought is gone,
She’s my most devoted and the way she gives head,
Well…it might even be worth it, if I end up dead.

Now Monica, loved that I gave up on religion,
Although she was all for my existing circumcision,
Yet I saw in her eyes a despise for being chastised,
About her temptation to get the others baptized,
Or her urge to stop the orgies and become a mother,
Indeed she was like no other,
In bed she was up for anal, bondage, and facials,
Yet she also gave dirty looks to inter-racials,
It was that internal struggle between slut and religion,
That had me worried about it seeming forbidden,
And how one day she’d snap in a bi-polar manner,
With my neck broken strung up from a banner.

As for Heather she loved being bound in leather,
Whenever the four of us would go out together,
She would always have me racking my damn brain,
Wondering whether the bitch was utterly insane,
Cause she toyed with bane, or a whip and chain,
Infringing on my domain, yet who am I to complain,
After all the lustful sex had me curling my toes,
Living scared, with just my woes and the blows,
That we’d exchange, she had a thing for choking,
You see, if Heather wasn’t turning blue, provoking-
Asthmatic attacks she couldn’t seem to cum,
So imagine my worry if the tables were run,
And my wives decided to try the choking on me,
Leaving me a victim of my self inflicted fantasy. 48

In truth, things did finally turn possessive,
As the sex went way past the usual aggressive,
When we found out that Liz had a baby due in May,
Monica grew weary, screaming there’s no way,
I knew for me, it was time to get away,
Seemingly, that’s when my mind went astray,
For when I woke up, it wasn’t to my usual sensation,
This morning seemed bleak with a loss of recreation,
Before me hung Monica, neck broken, face blue,
Strung up from a banner, and then, case two-
I saw Liz from the corner of my eyes,
Naked on the training bike, bleeding between her thighs,
I ran to Heather’s room, attacked her, choking her,
It had to be her, there was no knowing her,
Yet as I choked the last breathe from her body,
I saw the blood on my hands, it seems that I’ve been naughty…

"The light at the end of the tunnel has been extinguished, by the blood that runs from my open veins."

[Lucifa]

shoulda took the no show win and ran off laughing ..

Tek - a fairly 'by the numbers' kinda piece .. you mentioned the beat but I don't know that track and really can't be bothered to search for it to check the flow .. but for a text piece .. the flow was pretty straight anyway .. the read however was rather plain .. I felt no empathy or sympathy toward the content and characters of the piece .. the aspects of the writing were just marginally above average .. lacking in imagery or any spark or flare .. just a pretty ordinary text verse with very little personality .. and to say you labelled it as a personal piece and the concept to which the content is geared .. it's kinda disappointing to have had no effect from reading it ..

GL? - what's your sudden fascination with this bi-polar shit? .. lol .. and no surprises I guess that we're back to people dying .. making up for last week with 3 getting the GL? treatment this week .. the story was nothing great at all .. I wouldn't call it standard or ordinary .. as who the fuck has 3 wives living under the same roof and kills them? .. apart from the odd muslim and maybe a dark secret of Hugh Hefner .. this said .. I did find it quite entertaining as the read was steady with a simple structure of describing each wife and situations in seperate verses .. it worked and I never felt off put or distracted from the plot .. unimaginative and uncreative .. unimpressive even .. but ..

Vote = Got Life? .. "but .." it was more entertaining than Tek's piece .. now with the content put forward by Tek I'm sure he isn't looking to 'entertain' the reader as such .. but I never felt involved or remotely gripped to Tek's piece .. it really had little emotional value that I was expecting from reading his introduction to it .. GL? just trood on safe ground with his standard formula of death and murder .. but the read was more appealling in terms of the mechanics as well as the material ..

[TeKneeK]

i really wanted to and just laugh ...but.... naa..... wouldnt feel right jus taking that NS win.....


ill post votes here...

[Quriosity]

tekneek, you damn near surprised me here with a strong writer's voice and good descriptions throughout, two major faults though that i feel hurt the impact of the story and that is [1] the fact that the emotional tie wasn't present and [2] there was an entire missing segment to complete the story, the two go hand in hand because i feel that the missing segment would/should have delivered the emotional value that a story of this caliber would have needed to leave that lasting impression, but as is you had a verse packed with facts and descriptions but never actually portraying the agony of the actual tragedy that took place, you just skipped around it and it felt incomplete as i read, you should have described the event in the same detail that you described everything else but actually during the event which would have displayed emotion by default had you done it right, instead you just kind of covered before and after and never really touched on the actual event in which the story was based upon, the flow was decent throughout, sometimes a little wordy but overall a good enough flow to keep reading, wording was good for the most part and there werent many/any grammatical errors or spelling that i can remember, overall this was pretty good but you fell short of topics potential

got life?, the tie in to the topic was weak, seemed as though you started writing and just tried to make it fit, it also threw me off because the narrator/husband didnt seem to be hurt so who's open wounds did blood run from?, regardless --i think you delivered the more complete verse here, this would have been a tough decision had tek stuck to the script and finished the story, your flow as always was good enough to keep reading in which this case i felt that it started better than it ended, the format/structure in which you unraveled the story worked well for this piece by introducing each character and then tying their deaths to their sexual characteristics, i can't say it was creative but then again i can't say that it wasn't, typical murder piece from you minus the pure insanity, the story progressed smoothly in the beginning and then rapidly in the end but it all still seemed to work for the most part, overall this was a decent plot with a weak take on the topic written fairly well and in a more complete and consice manner than your opponents

honestly, this is probably the closest match that i have read as of yet, but tek fell short in areas that would have pulled him through in the end, as is i think the more complete verse gets the nod here, nothing extraordinary from either participant and i really feel that tek could have won here but GL, as usual, does just enough to get the W

so, vote - got life?

[Lord Drama]

this is a good match

Tek.. I liked the piece man..good descriptions...although I didnt know what beat you wrote to, it was written well and I had no trouble staying with it with no music..The story would have been just as effective had it not been true. nothing really bad to say about this piece for me, but it the theme wasnt that original.

Gotlife.. I felt you came more creative this week then tek. The story was kinda wierd, but it worked. You seemed to be able to carry the story across to each description of each girl and then conclude with climax. Comparing it to teks, it seems more thought out and complete as a story and was more interesting for me to read.

vote gotlife

[J o o k]

Yeah this is a pretty cool match.

I read both verses, and it was just that Got Life? at his average comes off better than tek at his average. Because these were pretty mediocre if that verses from both of you. I can see where tek was trying to make this a meaningful thing, but it just didn't have the emotion it should have. I think Got Life just posted the usual Got Life verse which is imagery + medium shock factor + a couple dainty words = an average verse overall.

Vote Got Life.

[RICO]

hmmmm,


Tek is good from this point of view. i can really hear em like a narraation from a movie or something. i actually enjoyed this. it was well written, and emotion was right on.

yet Got- at first i thought it was about a pimp. but then i thought it was comedy. but after all three girls i realized it was just a dude that had three girls, but the whole baby thing was kinda quick, and the ending kinda left me empty. like he did it????? but he didnt remember and he thought it was home girl that was pregnat or.....iono....any way


vote-gl


only cause i just enoyd reading his more......that is all

any way tek i always like reading your shit you as well are a great writer.