My Teyeme Has Come
We as humans, are designed to fail
a train made to ride the rails
made from planks of wood, spikes and nails.
When people say you could die tomorrow
I laugh it off, fuck livin a life of sorrow
I'd like to say I'd die today
but have trouble actin like my time was borrowed
Teeth chatter, knees weaken..
free speach recieved to defeat my weak evenings
Repeat my day to day work to feed demons
tryin to need reasons to live with this cheap grievance
I had days of fuckin floozies.. boozin in my prime
it was suitable but ludacris no human is divine
I walked a tight rope with a beast chewin on the line
the truth is in my mind - in a beautiful design
days of hood rats -
can't look back the doctor says theres a tumor in my spine
I'm losin hair now - morphine is keepin me sane
depletin the pain....
easin my brain..
this seems inhumane, seekin Jesus needin to pray
but fuck that- I'm bald - not a human -
just an evil display that's seepin away
my family weeps as I bleed and decay
I'm not dead yet - just hangin on with a child's grip
my mom and my dad by my colostomy bags - where my bile drips
next to that my food tube - with water in a mild mix
bleeding on the floor, they can tell by the way the tile sticks
I don't need my family exposed to temper tantrums
but they said its just a growth I was copin with my chances
cancer spreads, but not as fast as the globe and its advancements
but my hope had been abondonded
like Moses after he wrote the Ten Commandments.
My mother - a wonderful woman, wouldn't wanna hurt the gal
she let this little human crawl out of her birth canal
and dad always stuck with her, like "she's worth it pal"
we finally talked for once - that was where we agreed
that no fucking parents should ever have to bury their seed
he wouldn't let me die - as if it was his decision to make
and for once in his life he'd be given a break
"just let me go pops, for my sickeness's sake"
still the fellas waitin for celebrations with ribbons and cake
so to dad and mom.. I'm sayin goodbye
and to other friends I've attained in my life
for every instance - theres a place and a time
but in this situation I'm just waitin to die.
They sit next to me with flowers "You need to fight the fear"
but in my eyes are tears, and hurt that shows my time is near
I don't need to explain my rights and wrongs to peasants
sing the righteous songs of heaven
but will this fight prolong the present?
to the pad I write this on - even despite the longest lessons
we'd all like to love acceptance
never saw the essance of the time -
but in death I learned that time is of the essance.