Public Funerals

[absolute zero]

She was always of
the sweetest romance novel.
Her eyes burned o'er the water
softened. Stillwater blankets.

Pinch the dying.

Ease the violin strings
in her room. She slept
Caressing the pillowcases: Soft. Wet.

She always wept.

Inside her rotting breast
rationing stillborn hopes
with moonlight for cover.

To die beside her mother.

[Black Liquid]

i really dont know what to say about this one so i just quote you on the part that hit hardest.

" She always wept.

Inside her rotting breast
rationing stillborn hopes
with moonlight for cover.

To die beside her mother."

i cant really put a finger on it, but for some reason that part just reached out to me. keep doin it
-Liq

[UFO the Phoenix]

pinching the dying??!?!?!?

where did this come from?.....very different from you....not a nature poem?!?!?!?....but powerful non the less...I want to know its orgins and what inspired you to write this one....makes me think of the Katrina victims....I dont know why

who was she?....

I know you dont have hidden messages or mutli layers of metaphors within these short poems but I always seem to walk away with a ton of mystery thanks to you....lol....

[Xyliere]

"She was always of
the sweetest romance novel."

I think this line makes the poem a little less serious, and to be honest, a little cheesy for an opening to such a mellifluous piece.


"She always wept.

Inside her rotting breast
rationing stillborn hopes
with moonlight for cover.

To die beside her mother."

I loved this line, especially the clever pun of the moonlight being a cover as both light shining on her and the blankets of her bed. The rhyming threw me off a little because I did not notice it in the beginning of the poem, but otherwise this was a very eloquent ending. Overall my favorite lines are:

"Her eyes burned o'er the water
softened. Stillwater blankets. "

because they make me think of the analogy of the poem talking about the inside of a womb, and the womb being the bed.

great piece.