-What the hell is Happening?

RealMS · 08-04-2005, 06:08 PM

Mother to Daughter

Mama, on her day off, falls asleep early, around 10
With her dressing mirror lights still on.
Getting out of the shower, it’s almost midnight
I notice this déjà vu…
With the towel wrapped around me, I walk to her room,
And turn her lights off.

Mama looks like a doll, I thought as I walked out
But not those ugly superficial ones,
She’s so real…
And peaceful…when she’s tired and asleep
But like routine tomorrow morning,
I’ll hear her voice so naturally loud,
And I promise it’s the only thing that could always
Wake me up from bad dreams…

Getting dressed, drying my hair,
Why’s it always got to be so damn wavy…
I’ll ask mama to fix it tomorrow, oh wait,
Tomorrow she has to get ready for her night shift…
Not that I am unable to do my own hair,
I just like how she fixes it, and takes her time,
Well, it could be that or I’m just lazy sometimes…

On mama’s day(s) off I’ll help her with the cooking,
She always tells me to raise the windows and I’d wonder
Why she wants the aroma to disappear…
It makes home, makes the hours spent serene,
One of few moments I get to spend with her…
…besides the crowds of company…

I don’t wonder, when will she have to leave…
It’s just the thought, what’s gonna happen to me…
I’ve inherited all of her traits, both good and not so good,
And though she was the one who taught me strength
At a young age,
I will be a woman soon, and I’m having
Some doubt I may not be as strong…

Having a certain purpose and knowing it,
Having a heart ripped apart over emotional things…
And then sewing it.
Being happy and fulfilled with the ones you’ve
Touched, gave your blessings to, and not needing
Anything else…

It’s so many things I can’t explain,
I wish I could talk about it, but
I know she needs to sleep.

Thinking back on all the times our stubborn
Minds clashed,
And after throwing point-of-views around
One time she came in front of me, with one hand
Touching my cheek, saying
“One day you’ll understand. Don’t cry.”

Tears of silent frustration cause yes, she was right
That day, I wiped my eyes after she left the room
And I walked to my own bedroom, lying on my stomach
With my head turned…on the pillow just thinking
Feeling like my eyes were all puffy…and soon
They’d just close and forget to worry,
Falling asleep…

That day reminds me of her tonight,
Except mama wasn’t crying at all, not for awhile now
And arguments lately did not exist.
We spent the day together, it was her day off,
And when we came home and later she
Fell asleep, I told her the same thing she told me
Earlier…
I just wanted her to hear it, this time,
That I love her.

Maybe later…maybe now.

ManMadeofAshes · 08-04-2005, 06:59 PM

....

i dont really know what to say.

this is really beautiful. It seems so close yet so far away. LIke I woke up with you that day your mom fixed your hair, or was cooking dinner with the windows open.

you have an awsome way of describing things. One thing I like about you is you seem less focused on your rhythm then most poets in the realm, yet your words feel so much more like poetry. Your dont write nothing words. They all mean something and thats hard to accomplish. You are one of the few who's work I seek out.

oh and I will get to you on what you sent me. Im still trying to figure out what to do with it but Ive had it up on my screen since you sent it just so you know Im think about it.

take care realms. Always nice to read your work.

ashes

illpoetical · 08-04-2005, 10:50 PM

i love the way you write ur poems...a gift u have

skandelous_lala · 08-05-2005, 08:13 AM

I loved it...I loved it not only b/c I could "see" everything you were saying but b/c I could also feel it.
.

Sole Sovereign · 08-05-2005, 10:26 AM

Will get back to this.

Quotive · 08-05-2005, 02:21 PM

There's not much I can say about this, I liked it and all, but... hmm

the "maybe now" at the end didn't fit to me.. that's about the only thing I didn't like.

You have a great writing ability, and most of the time it inspires me to write.

Good ish..

KAtpower · 08-05-2005, 11:48 PM

very beautiful and simplictic hints of a very deep relationship. I like how you take us into your setting so that we can see what you and your momma's relationship is all about. It makes the powm itslef very vivid and desrptive. You dont say 'what'--- you say "how" and these are the things that make great poetry... not all mushy mushy... it is the grey areas that make our lives (and our interactions with our loved ones) all the more real.
- write on!

Bhitiah · 08-08-2005, 04:25 AM

Man, Did I not reply to this either? I saw this, I read this, I replied to this....Nah, I didnt, 2 out of 3 tho aint bad.

This was tight, I feel this forreal. Girl, When you comin with the collab, I thought you were gonna mail me your part? What's with that?! Always ditchin somebody. Lemme know!

Mind~$oul · 08-11-2005, 05:21 PM

"I just wanted her to hear it, this time,
That I love her."

That's one thing I wish I was able to to my mother more of before she died. Seem like I spent my whole time hating her for something she was just tryin to prepare me for. Life.

One luv

AlmostFamous · 08-11-2005, 05:53 PM

She’s so real…
And peaceful…when she’s tired and asleep

wow... this right here is what keeps me replying to your pieces.

the way you wrote it just is so intense...

keep up realms

Wicked5744 · 08-12-2005, 03:37 AM

This is damned good. Sometimes we just need to appreciate their frustrations instead of trying to understand them. An ode to mother's always called for, no matter the day.

08-04-2005, 06:08 PM	#1 (permalink)
RealMS Pro 31 Join Date: Feb 2004 Location: Lafayette/New Orleans, LA Posts: 4,236	-What the hell is Happening? Mother to Daughter Mama, on her day off, falls asleep early, around 10 With her dressing mirror lights still on. Getting out of the shower, it’s almost midnight I notice this déjà vu… With the towel wrapped around me, I walk to her room, And turn her lights off. Mama looks like a doll, I thought as I walked out But not those ugly superficial ones, She’s so real… And peaceful…when she’s tired and asleep But like routine tomorrow morning, I’ll hear her voice so naturally loud, And I promise it’s the only thing that could always Wake me up from bad dreams… Getting dressed, drying my hair, Why’s it always got to be so damn wavy… I’ll ask mama to fix it tomorrow, oh wait, Tomorrow she has to get ready for her night shift… Not that I am unable to do my own hair, I just like how she fixes it, and takes her time, Well, it could be that or I’m just lazy sometimes… On mama’s day(s) off I’ll help her with the cooking, She always tells me to raise the windows and I’d wonder Why she wants the aroma to disappear… It makes home, makes the hours spent serene, One of few moments I get to spend with her… …besides the crowds of company… I don’t wonder, when will she have to leave… It’s just the thought, what’s gonna happen to me… I’ve inherited all of her traits, both good and not so good, And though she was the one who taught me strength At a young age, I will be a woman soon, and I’m having Some doubt I may not be as strong… Having a certain purpose and knowing it, Having a heart ripped apart over emotional things… And then sewing it. Being happy and fulfilled with the ones you’ve Touched, gave your blessings to, and not needing Anything else… It’s so many things I can’t explain, I wish I could talk about it, but I know she needs to sleep. Thinking back on all the times our stubborn Minds clashed, And after throwing point-of-views around One time she came in front of me, with one hand Touching my cheek, saying “One day you’ll understand. Don’t cry.” Tears of silent frustration cause yes, she was right That day, I wiped my eyes after she left the room And I walked to my own bedroom, lying on my stomach With my head turned…on the pillow just thinking Feeling like my eyes were all puffy…and soon They’d just close and forget to worry, Falling asleep… That day reminds me of her tonight, Except mama wasn’t crying at all, not for awhile now And arguments lately did not exist. We spent the day together, it was her day off, And when we came home and later she Fell asleep, I told her the same thing she told me Earlier… I just wanted her to hear it, this time, That I love her. Maybe later…maybe now.

08-04-2005, 06:59 PM	#2 (permalink)
ManMadeofAshes *DREAMER Join Date: Jun 2004 Location: at home Posts: 635	.... i dont really know what to say. this is really beautiful. It seems so close yet so far away. LIke I woke up with you that day your mom fixed your hair, or was cooking dinner with the windows open. you have an awsome way of describing things. One thing I like about you is you seem less focused on your rhythm then most poets in the realm, yet your words feel so much more like poetry. Your dont write nothing words. They all mean something and thats hard to accomplish. You are one of the few who's work I seek out. oh and I will get to you on what you sent me. Im still trying to figure out what to do with it but Ive had it up on my screen since you sent it just so you know Im think about it. take care realms. Always nice to read your work. ashes __________________ http://www.myspace.com/manmadeofashes

08-04-2005, 10:50 PM	#3 (permalink)
illpoetical raising the bar everyday Join Date: Jun 2000 Location: Long Island Posts: 1,533	i love the way you write ur poems...a gift u have __________________ How vain it is to sit down and write when you have not stood up to live. The skill of writing is to create a context in which other people can think.

08-05-2005, 08:13 AM	#4 (permalink)
skandelous_lala back from the dead Join Date: Sep 2000 Location: Hey! Fuck you and the horse you rode in on! Posts: 26,707	I loved it...I loved it not only b/c I could "see" everything you were saying but b/c I could also feel it. . __________________ ALL YOU REALLY KNOW IS WHAT I CHOOSE TO SHOW Good Mourning, Good afternoon, Good nite, what have you done with your life?. Everybody's time comes to be embraced by the light you only afraid to die when you ain't livin right

08-05-2005, 10:26 AM	#5 (permalink)
Sole Sovereign Hungry But Never Starving Join Date: Jan 2001 Posts: 2,927	Will get back to this. __________________ ...Take a step: one step, one dive... ...Fate is death. A leap of faith over sunset's sunrise... ...Hate is everpresent, some let love die... ...even if you laced loosely, some get tongue tied... elo§overeign ˜W™

08-05-2005, 11:48 PM	#7 (permalink)
KAtpower Registered User Join Date: Aug 2005 Posts: 28	very beautiful and simplictic hints of a very deep relationship. I like how you take us into your setting so that we can see what you and your momma's relationship is all about. It makes the powm itslef very vivid and desrptive. You dont say 'what'--- you say "how" and these are the things that make great poetry... not all mushy mushy... it is the grey areas that make our lives (and our interactions with our loved ones) all the more real. - write on!

08-08-2005, 04:25 AM	#8 (permalink)
Bhitiah Powerful Scriptures Join Date: May 2004 Posts: 1,168	Man, Did I not reply to this either? I saw this, I read this, I replied to this....Nah, I didnt, 2 out of 3 tho aint bad. This was tight, I feel this forreal. Girl, When you comin with the collab, I thought you were gonna mail me your part? What's with that?! Always ditchin somebody. Lemme know! __________________ You can bomb the world to peices, but cant bomb into peace

08-11-2005, 05:21 PM	#9 (permalink)
Mind~$oul I'm Pretty Join Date: Apr 2001 Location: North Memphis BITCH! Posts: 17,145	"I just wanted her to hear it, this time, That I love her." That's one thing I wish I was able to to my mother more of before she died. Seem like I spent my whole time hating her for something she was just tryin to prepare me for. Life. One luv __________________ "Everybody wanna be a nicca, but don't nobody wanna be a nicca"-Paul Mooney "I tried to live right, but society aint made for niccas to live right"-Joe Budden

08-11-2005, 05:53 PM	#10 (permalink)
AlmostFamous U got a problem? Join Date: Jan 2005 Location: Sioux Falls Posts: 2,789	She’s so real… And peaceful…when she’s tired and asleep wow... this right here is what keeps me replying to your pieces. the way you wrote it just is so intense... keep up realms __________________ the good lord giveth and he taketh away isnt that the truth My name is Nate Short MYSPACE NAME:http://www.myspace.com/tooshortnate

08-12-2005, 03:37 AM	#11 (permalink)
Wicked5744 Last I awoke, it was morn Join Date: Jan 2002 Location: Big D Posts: 1,490	This is damned good. Sometimes we just need to appreciate their frustrations instead of trying to understand them. An ode to mother's always called for, no matter the day. __________________ I rolled four times and landed on my feet

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