Crushed

fluentvoice · 05-20-2005, 07:15 PM

thin green people swoon in synchronism
bodies reflecting light from above
sweat glistening from each of them
painting the landscape

a giant stomps over them
green people crushed under his feet
he takes a whiff of the air
smells like mildew

yawn

good morning

Luther · 05-21-2005, 05:19 PM

Interesting, I must say. I'm not sure what to say. It was great imagery. Cool idea too. Thanks for the read.

Mind~$oul · 05-24-2005, 04:18 AM

Welcome to the realm first off. This was a strange poem I must say. I think I have sort of an idea on what you were aiming at with this...back i'm not tooooo sure. Dont want to make myself sound like a fool in here. Well be looking out for you.

One luv

koban4max · 06-08-2005, 03:24 PM

good poem...u pretty much got it on target...keep it up

05-20-2005, 07:15 PM	#1 (permalink)
fluentvoice Registered User Join Date: May 2005 Posts: 101	Crushed thin green people swoon in synchronism bodies reflecting light from above sweat glistening from each of them painting the landscape a giant stomps over them green people crushed under his feet he takes a whiff of the air smells like mildew yawn good morning

05-21-2005, 05:19 PM	#2 (permalink)
Luther Registered User Join Date: Jun 2004 Posts: 249	Interesting, I must say. I'm not sure what to say. It was great imagery. Cool idea too. Thanks for the read. __________________ Love of mine, someday you will die But I'll be close behind I'll follow you into the dark No blinding light, or tunnels to gates of white Just our hands clasped so tight, waiting for the hint of a spark If heaven and hell decide that they both are satisfied Illuminate the no's on their vacancy signs If there's no one beside you when your soul embarks Then I'll follow you into the dark

05-24-2005, 04:18 AM	#3 (permalink)
Mind~$oul I'm Pretty Join Date: Apr 2001 Location: North Memphis BITCH! Posts: 17,145	Welcome to the realm first off. This was a strange poem I must say. I think I have sort of an idea on what you were aiming at with this...back i'm not tooooo sure. Dont want to make myself sound like a fool in here. Well be looking out for you. One luv __________________ "Everybody wanna be a nicca, but don't nobody wanna be a nicca"-Paul Mooney "I tried to live right, but society aint made for niccas to live right"-Joe Budden

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06-08-2005, 03:24 PM	#4 (permalink)
koban4max Registered User Join Date: Sep 2003 Posts: 428	good poem...u pretty much got it on target...keep it up

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