Teary Eyed..keystyles...

[lpoet]

i thought i was going to key a poem tonight but theres just way to many things on my mind to pick one....so i keyed these lil short thoughts up instead...

just some thoughts i had tonight...any of you guys have a bunch of unfinished shit like this? lately when i open my notebook this is all i can do...



i....i breath in deeply
while sitting silently
alowing the pain to
ease though my veins and
curdle my brown skin
i exhale in hopes that the
next breath will be as
sensational as the last and
quickly take it in...

i'm sorry
i apologize
i was alone and
found shelter within u
beautiful u
i used love as a cruth
and used your hands to
sheild away the truth

daddy you hurt me but i'll never let u know it
and swear to god these 3 lines will be the only
things in my life that i will ever devote to u
hearts on sleaves tears on cheeks i
never really grieved when grandma died
and i still regret the way i sucked back the tears
like a man when i was only a boy made to be a man way 2 soon
never really comminted on you but in this life wouldnt
be possible if you hadnt lead me though
my shinning star i only pray that i will become half the man
you've molded me into
my daughter
you are so beautiful i dont understand sometimes
how anyone could be blessed with such gifts as
i was with you..i'd die to share every momment of my life with u
i've spent most of my life as a sinner and want despertly to
change my life for u..or atleast i say i do
sometimes my actions speak louder then my words i sin
pray sin again and act as if life and forgiveness go hand and hand
beliving you will pardon every igorent thing i do...
i spend hrs wondering which direction i will choose...
life seems like such a struggle sometimes i wanna just give up
but i dont beacuse of u..briana u are my strength and i only wish
that you knew you possesd half the strengh that u do...one day
hand and hand will will stand..white gown black tux tears of joy
and i dos...forever in love with you

i used to want to find life
like real life but u cant see life
without living life so i searched
for things that i thought made life
but now i'm reaching for things not found
in life...my destiny isnt here its in the after life
so i no longer care about
what real life feels like
fuck life......

i wanna cry
i need to cry
i gotta cry
but i wont
i wont cry
i wont cry for you

..cries....

[Quotive]

"i'm sorry
i apologize
i was alone and
found shelter within u
beautiful u
i used love as a cruth
and used your hands to
sheild away the truth"

i like that, i can relate.

i have tons of shyt like this.. i cant finish it because most stuff turns out horrible, because i dont have the same train of thought as when i first began

cool stuff tho..

[unspoken1]

i like these.....and yes a lot of things i write go unfinished...but over the last few months i havent been able to write anything...im trying now to get back into it....well like i said these were all nice...my favorite has to be the first...oh and next time you have something unfinished show me maybe ill be able to write something to it...i need all the inspiration i can get....

[BrokenSoul8604]

damn...you beat me to it...i was gonna do this..just type up some of my thoughts from my notebook....but oh well..i'll still do it later...lol

"daddy you hurt me but i'll never let u know it
and swear to god these 3 lines will be the only
things in my life that i will ever devote to u "


^^THAT....cant even find the words to describe how ill that is......

i just cant.....

you are a talent....a true poet.....i appreciate the opprutunity to read your pieces...and although you dont know it..ive learned from a couple of people since i became a member...

and youre one....you should feel soooo proud!!
lol jp
but yea

stay up

God Bless

[UFO the Phoenix]

hmmmm goood idea....I'm sure every poet in here has unfinished poems in their notebooks (I know I do...lol)....this was cool

didnt think it work at first but then after reading them all...oddly enough they all are connected in their own way....

my favorite one was the 3rd one...very nice lines in it...very touching....man that was tight

I'm gonna have to do one of these one day....

thanks for the inspiration and blessing us with multi gems

respect due

PEACE AND GODBLESS


PS: get at me yo...you should sign up for the mini series you be tight in the mixture

[lpoet]

thanks everyone...

[allnakey]

Yea man I feel you on this, i got some many unfished pieces... or just thoughts that I wrote down... i could easily post up something like this... Every piece felt incomplete, but I tried to complete some of them myself, I was really liking how they all started off... this was a good idea, and it was full of good ideas for pieces


Stay Up, Much Love, Peace

[niniane17]

damn son.............. this was nice, so many different feelings and emotions in these little pieces, it was like a compilation of pain, i enjoyed this drop, it was something different in with all of these other great poems on this page, lovin it, thank you for the chance to read this key style, god bless

[Mind~$oul]

You already know I got tons of unfinished shit laying around my room. I really what to go back and to something to them, but something keeps tellin me to keep them as they are.

The third poems is something special man. Would never expect to something like that coming from you. I understand why that one was just finished.

one luv

[lpoet]

Originally Posted by Mind~$oul

The third poems is something special man. Would never expect to something like that coming from you. I understand why that one was just finished.

one luv

thanks man..thats my fav out the bunch..really my first piece like that..felt good getting that on paper..

one thing i wanted to let u all know was that this was not stuff in my notebook..its just how the shit came out when i sat down to write..i guess iw asnt that focesed b/c my thoughts just jumped and i wrote those poems

anyhow..

Upin...cats is sleepin on this

[lpoet]

still sleeping

[ManMadeofAshes]

Im not sure if I have read anything by you. Probably have. I try not to look at names to much because I don't like the idea of becoming biased based on knowing "this person" has shown their love. Plus your a Mod, and a lot of the times I get the impression that people are just kissing your asses cause they responces seem so forced. Thats just what Ive seen, but I could be biased. haha. Okay, so I really enjoyed the peice. For some reason I sort of get a kick out of that scattered, but almost still related type poem. I have been dividing my up into days and weeks to have to same effect, but to make sure I very clearly drew out a seperation. Anyway, you explained this before hand so it wasnt necissary.

do I have a bunch of unfinished shit? haha, its all unfinished. Its when I finally give up that it makes its way in there. haha. If you can't focus on a single subject than don't I just get an idea and write it down and when I am depressed and need a distraction I will pick it back up again, and think.. when this will make my mind off my life for a bit. (yea its sad that I usually only write well when Im sad. Happieness is a form of shallowness for me. Its perfectly functional for my emotional state, but when I am trying to analyze or be creative the friction starts kicking in. Anyway for not being able to focus on a single thing you pulled off a nice poem and a variety of things. They all seem to carry the same underlying theme of personal reflection and I like that.

"i breath in deeply
while sitting silently
alowing the pain to
ease though my veins and
curdle my brown skin " <--this is real nice and brings up some good memories.. paticularly my memories of being on morphine. lol painful purple morphine crush yellow oxycodien kisses snowwhite vicodin teardrops opiated blue sky wishes. sound sleep but still completely conscious. wide awake but still sleeping. Surrounded by completely lucid darkness. My eyes are open but Im dreaming. haha yummmmm definately a hot line

"i'm sorry
i apologize
i was alone and
found shelter within u
beautiful u
i used love as a cruth"

^ this is really nice. I just wrote something that reminded me of this a few minutes before I opened this post. ohh spooky. my mother said she was beautiful a said yess yesss I know i know. She was my shelter and there is no place like home. lol

I also like the line -i used you as a crutch- I know this is about a lady friend, err. i think it is, but it still reminded me of religion. I just like the whole image of collapse into yourself without this person by your side.

"daddy you hurt me but i'll never let u know it
and swear to god these 3 lines will be the only
things in my life that i will ever devote to u "

^wish you would give him more than 3 lines cause this shit caught my attention. The worst news is the best news. what oh what did this man do to you? very good lines.

"i've spent most of my life as a sinner and want despertly to
change my life for u..or atleast i say i do"

^.... hot hot hot! lol

next stanza you use life like crazy, but you did it in a very graceful manner. Very cool poem.

Ashes

[MisterEThoughts]

This was real beautiful i definitely got many pieces scrapped all around my room car bed table everywhere i got pieces which are unfinished but you know i really enjoyed this soo sad you know this might not be finished but i still felt the connection between them all and i think you did a great job with imagery and word usage mad respect man beautiful.....

[augee.ali]

aye homeboy....that was some passionate shit alright...I see where you comin from.

[RealMS]

[i]Its kinda like the inner child of you that came out for awhile, just to get out what you didn't have the chance to release back then-but, also realizing you are a man and gotta take responsibility for everything held accountable for. I think the 3rd piece just about did it for me. Walking in your own footsteps and not somebody else's. You're like walking wisdom, people can learn so much from just reading what you write, or just a simple conversation. Nice work indeed.
-Much Love

[lpoet]

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