Short key style

Cockmaster700 · 10-03-2004, 08:43 PM

Short key style

I got bazaar scroll hot like charcoal brains get barbecued
With True flames, crew aims be high so we eat jar foods
Flow best during protests// use picket signs wrote wicked lines
Even crickets find joy work and chirp with conflicted minds
On the streets got vapor but sheets of paper printed constitutes
A book even brutes are hooked on scribes I write, play flutes
Like the pied piper, fight with pistols bullet flying like flights
Of missiles my bling is bright crystals but I’m afraid of heights
Pounce on clowns rhymes bounce on grounds like rubber balls
Discover all the luxuries, girls twist hips and kiss lips ballers on call
In rap if your butt soft you get shut off like light switches
So I write and switches up styles hurt brains now they need stitches

BrokenSoul8604 · 10-03-2004, 09:33 PM

open mic....

Open Mic....

OPEN MIC....

OPENNNNNNNN MIIIIICCCCCCCC!!!!!!!!!!!!!

God Bless

DaJackle · 10-03-2004, 09:34 PM

^^lol

Cockmaster700 · 10-03-2004, 09:59 PM

thanks for the responses yall come on with them

UFO the Phoenix · 10-04-2004, 02:33 AM

................................... ....

this was................................ ........(blank)

*I will edit and fill in response when you peep other poets*

no short cuts in the poetry realm

PEACE AND GODBLESS

Cockmaster700 · 10-04-2004, 06:54 AM

yeh god bless but I face odd stress// look I disperse firm and crawl like earthworms, burst perms// or split wigs legit like Mr biggs// and R Kelly, sometimes at lively dances collide with jivy romances meet a new hag as a dew rag// be my headpiece a girl's lips be a red feast//

ManMadeofAshes · 10-04-2004, 12:14 PM

already said this.. you put way too much emphasis on rhythm. Whats the point is it doesn't make sense? I can pick that apart and ask you to explain what a percieve as illogical, but that is more time than its worth, especially considering you have poetry mastered and should be teaching. What can I say to that? Yes yes, thank you for the responce god bless

Cockmaster700 · 10-04-2004, 01:50 PM

thanks for the response but yall this stuff is rhyming should count for something bu they still love your responses

niniane17 · 10-04-2004, 03:51 PM

this was.............. alright i guess, it seemed reaallyforced, like, it flowed but nothing really went together, or that was my feelings. and it was like you just cut it off, where's the end? all in all, this was okay simply because you spent the time to write it, but it seems that not much effort was put into this.

Cockmaster700 · 10-05-2004, 06:21 AM

niniane17 thanks for the response for real doe

Sole Sovereign · 10-05-2004, 12:29 PM

for real doe.. .lol... here's a helpfull tip.. syllable counting does not equate for rythm.. and an audience has to relate to what your displaying for it to be art.

Peace

Cockmaster700 · 10-05-2004, 03:30 PM

all right thanks for the props and critique

tooshort21 · 10-05-2004, 04:21 PM

alright...( keep telling myself im not going to blow up on this cat)... have control woosaw... what is your major malfunction... sorry if i came across bluntly... but thats the only way i know anymore... lol

Cockmaster700 · 10-05-2004, 04:59 PM

love these here props yall keep on bringing them for real this stuff is hot yall

bobbythebear · 10-05-2004, 05:00 PM

now they need stitches
so I fill in divisions or rather gaps
between thinly veiled raps
we all know that aint a poem
like messages sent
without waiting for the dial tone
wackness breads wackness
so agress away
to fit in I'd act the part
but creative minds dont fuction that way
hard enough just to subdue my potential
and write this way
jawtapping highschool english kids
who still think poetics b str8 wordplay
its a shame when content is sacrificed
for rhyme schemes and rhythmic devices
without even a beat to back it
somebody done tried to hack into my muse
but she's not addicted to cracking
guarded by vague punchlines
so any so called poet with a habit of reacting
can madface away
you got metaphors for days?
they all sound simile to me
so throw your looking glass scrolls away
take the time to rewind your mind into progression
and treat this gift of expression the right way
now we come back to the matter at hand
dropping poetry on a poetry board - who'da thunk that shit man?
between the teen angst and vocab
I slang concepts and jokes so
from here on out the standard is set
respect goes beyond the written flow
and typical rhyme cliches
like when I serve netcees for being net-poets
they styles need stitches

tooshort21 · 10-05-2004, 05:09 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by bobbythebear

now they need stitches
so I fill in divisions or rather gaps
between thinly veiled raps
we all know that aint a poem
like messages sent
without waiting for the dial tone
wackness breads wackness
so agress away
to fit in I'd act the part
but creative minds dont fuction that way
hard enough just to subdue my potential
and write this way
jawtapping highschool english kids
who still think poetics b str8 wordplay
its a shame when content is sacrificed
for rhyme schemes and rhythmic devices
without even a beat to back it
somebody done tried to hack into my muse
but she's not addicted to cracking
guarded by vague punchlines
so any so called poet with a habit of reacting
can madface away
you got metaphors for days?
they all sound simile to me
so throw your looking glass scrolls away
take the time to rewind your mind into progression
and treat this gift of expression the right way
now we come back to the matter at hand
dropping poetry on a poetry board - who'da thunk that shit man?
between the teen angst and vocab
I slang concepts and jokes so
from here on out the standard is set
respect goes beyond the written flow
and typical rhyme cliches
like when I serve netcees for being net-poets
they styles need stitches

are you shaft700 with just a different username.... i sure hope not... just asking

bobbythebear · 10-05-2004, 05:21 PM

nope - the difference in quality should answer that question.

using rhymes to battle is fun, if its all in good fun. But its not poetry, and really not suited for a poetry forum. just my two cents. talk amongst yourselves.

tooshort21 · 10-05-2004, 05:24 PM

just checking, and i didnt mean anything by the question homie...... im actually glad that you arent him... welcom to the realm and enjoy your stay

Cockmaster700 · 10-05-2004, 11:06 PM

thanks for the responses this shit is very interesting for real yall

ManMadeofAshes · 10-06-2004, 01:25 AM

haha.. no way bobbythebear is shaft. That was actually nice. haha never thought I would find it in this post. (Hey I thought giving props. would be positive feedback. Shaft am I missing something?) anyway is there a way I can pull rep points (take them away) never asked cause I never considered before. haha...

shaft shall I save you the trouble... ?

= thanks yeah, ya know this shit is intresting, for real this is shits hot yo thank for props and love its appreciated for real yall.

10-03-2004, 08:43 PM	#1 (permalink)
Cockmaster700 Registered User Join Date: Feb 2004 Posts: 2,048	Short key style Short key style I got bazaar scroll hot like charcoal brains get barbecued With True flames, crew aims be high so we eat jar foods Flow best during protests// use picket signs wrote wicked lines Even crickets find joy work and chirp with conflicted minds On the streets got vapor but sheets of paper printed constitutes A book even brutes are hooked on scribes I write, play flutes Like the pied piper, fight with pistols bullet flying like flights Of missiles my bling is bright crystals but I’m afraid of heights Pounce on clowns rhymes bounce on grounds like rubber balls Discover all the luxuries, girls twist hips and kiss lips ballers on call In rap if your butt soft you get shut off like light switches So I write and switches up styles hurt brains now they need stitches

10-03-2004, 09:33 PM	#2 (permalink)
BrokenSoul8604 Apparently Emotionless Join Date: Sep 2004 Location: DMI~ Posts: 705	open mic.... Open Mic.... OPEN MIC.... OPENNNNNNNN MIIIIICCCCCCCC!!!!!!!!!!!!! God Bless __________________ A poem begins as a lump in the throat, a sense of wrong, a homesickness, a lovesickness.

10-03-2004, 09:34 PM	#3 (permalink)
DaJackle ThoughtS ProcessinG Join Date: Sep 2003 Location: Pittsburgh Posts: 493	^^lol __________________ You can only do so much in life, at some point you just have to let go and let God decide...what is the meaning of life? it's very simple...to simply live

10-04-2004, 02:33 AM	#5 (permalink)
UFO the Phoenix I DONT BELIEVE IN ALIENS! Join Date: Aug 1999 Location: Oceanside CA USA Posts: 2,965	................................... .... this was................................ ........(blank) I will edit and fill in response when you peep other poets no short cuts in the poetry realm PEACE AND GODBLESS __________________ *The Truth isn't out there because its already landed and the Truth is:* JESUS CHRIST Oddie Sloan

10-04-2004, 03:51 PM	#9 (permalink)
niniane17 Registered User Join Date: Sep 2004 Posts: 93	this was.............. alright i guess, it seemed reaallyforced, like, it flowed but nothing really went together, or that was my feelings. and it was like you just cut it off, where's the end? all in all, this was okay simply because you spent the time to write it, but it seems that not much effort was put into this. __________________ Niniane Memory hither come, And tune your merry notes; And while upon the wind, Your music floats, I'll pore upon the stream, Where sighing lovers dream, And fish for fancies as they pass Within the watery glass....... ----William Blake

10-03-2004, 09:59 PM	#4 (permalink)
Cockmaster700 Registered User Join Date: Feb 2004 Posts: 2,048	thanks for the responses yall come on with them

10-04-2004, 06:54 AM	#6 (permalink)
Cockmaster700 Registered User Join Date: Feb 2004 Posts: 2,048	yeh god bless but I face odd stress// look I disperse firm and crawl like earthworms, burst perms// or split wigs legit like Mr biggs// and R Kelly, sometimes at lively dances collide with jivy romances meet a new hag as a dew rag// be my headpiece a girl's lips be a red feast//

10-04-2004, 12:14 PM	#7 (permalink)
ManMadeofAshes *DREAMER Join Date: Jun 2004 Location: at home Posts: 635	already said this.. you put way too much emphasis on rhythm. Whats the point is it doesn't make sense? I can pick that apart and ask you to explain what a percieve as illogical, but that is more time than its worth, especially considering you have poetry mastered and should be teaching. What can I say to that? Yes yes, thank you for the responce god bless

10-04-2004, 01:50 PM	#8 (permalink)
Cockmaster700 Registered User Join Date: Feb 2004 Posts: 2,048	thanks for the response but yall this stuff is rhyming should count for something bu they still love your responses

10-05-2004, 06:21 AM	#10 (permalink)
Cockmaster700 Registered User Join Date: Feb 2004 Posts: 2,048	niniane17 thanks for the response for real doe

10-05-2004, 12:29 PM	#11 (permalink)
Sole Sovereign Hungry But Never Starving Join Date: Jan 2001 Posts: 2,927	for real doe.. .lol... here's a helpfull tip.. syllable counting does not equate for rythm.. and an audience has to relate to what your displaying for it to be art. Peace __________________ ...Take a step: one step, one dive... ...Fate is death. A leap of faith over sunset's sunrise... ...Hate is everpresent, some let love die... ...even if you laced loosely, some get tongue tied... elo§overeign ˜W™

10-05-2004, 03:30 PM	#12 (permalink)
Cockmaster700 Registered User Join Date: Feb 2004 Posts: 2,048	all right thanks for the props and critique

10-05-2004, 04:21 PM	#13 (permalink)
tooshort21 Banned Join Date: Jun 2004 Location: SIOUX Posts: 1,281	alright...( keep telling myself im not going to blow up on this cat)... have control woosaw... what is your major malfunction... sorry if i came across bluntly... but thats the only way i know anymore... lol __________________ will write poetry for food.

10-05-2004, 04:59 PM	#14 (permalink)
Cockmaster700 Registered User Join Date: Feb 2004 Posts: 2,048	love these here props yall keep on bringing them for real this stuff is hot yall

10-05-2004, 05:00 PM	#15 (permalink)
bobbythebear Registered User Join Date: Oct 2004 Posts: 17	now they need stitches so I fill in divisions or rather gaps between thinly veiled raps we all know that aint a poem like messages sent without waiting for the dial tone wackness breads wackness so agress away to fit in I'd act the part but creative minds dont fuction that way hard enough just to subdue my potential and write this way jawtapping highschool english kids who still think poetics b str8 wordplay its a shame when content is sacrificed for rhyme schemes and rhythmic devices without even a beat to back it somebody done tried to hack into my muse but she's not addicted to cracking guarded by vague punchlines so any so called poet with a habit of reacting can madface away you got metaphors for days? they all sound simile to me so throw your looking glass scrolls away take the time to rewind your mind into progression and treat this gift of expression the right way now we come back to the matter at hand dropping poetry on a poetry board - who'da thunk that shit man? between the teen angst and vocab I slang concepts and jokes so from here on out the standard is set respect goes beyond the written flow and typical rhyme cliches like when I serve netcees for being net-poets they styles need stitches

Currently Active Users Viewing This Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)

10-05-2004, 05:21 PM	#17 (permalink)
bobbythebear Registered User Join Date: Oct 2004 Posts: 17	nope - the difference in quality should answer that question. using rhymes to battle is fun, if its all in good fun. But its not poetry, and really not suited for a poetry forum. just my two cents. talk amongst yourselves.

10-05-2004, 05:24 PM	#18 (permalink)
tooshort21 Banned Join Date: Jun 2004 Location: SIOUX Posts: 1,281	just checking, and i didnt mean anything by the question homie...... im actually glad that you arent him... welcom to the realm and enjoy your stay __________________ will write poetry for food.

10-05-2004, 11:06 PM	#19 (permalink)
Cockmaster700 Registered User Join Date: Feb 2004 Posts: 2,048	thanks for the responses this shit is very interesting for real yall

10-06-2004, 01:25 AM	#20 (permalink)
ManMadeofAshes *DREAMER Join Date: Jun 2004 Location: at home Posts: 635	haha.. no way bobbythebear is shaft. That was actually nice. haha never thought I would find it in this post. (Hey I thought giving props. would be positive feedback. Shaft am I missing something?) anyway is there a way I can pull rep points (take them away) never asked cause I never considered before. haha... shaft shall I save you the trouble... ? = thanks yeah, ya know this shit is intresting, for real this is shits hot yo thank for props and love its appreciated for real yall.

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