Bored On A Saturday Bus

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Old 09-16-2004, 12:48 PM   #1 (permalink)
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BrokenSoul8604 takes it up the butt!
Bored On A Saturday Bus
Bored on a Saturday bus
Burning in bitter cold to
Ease into the sunset,
But the clouds, they blur my
View. So I turn to gaze at
A moon that lies distorted
Just the same and do not
Look down: the streams below
The bridge are not for play,
(hence the bridge)
Children do not laugh
As loud, and the road ahead
Is your lullaby…
This is the purest of poetry.
Knowing fully where you are
Going but not assured the safe
Trip there, and if you steer
Off course, where do you travel
From where? There is not a
Lover’s hand to hold, just a
Sea of strangers, that see
A lonely boy on his way back
Home from his home from years before
But if you ask, they’ll never know…
And if they did…
They’re twice as sure.









p.s. http://board.rapmusic.com/showthread...93#post9974793
http://board.rapmusic.com/showthread...00#post9974800
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Old 09-17-2004, 03:08 PM   #2 (permalink)
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this was nice..had a nice rhythem to it for me.....kind of reminds me of when i was in highschool and i would write as i looked outside the classroom windows

good job
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Old 09-17-2004, 09:30 PM   #3 (permalink)
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BrokenSoul8604 takes it up the butt!
thanks for the feedback

god bless
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Old 09-17-2004, 11:11 PM   #4 (permalink)
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illpoetical takes it up the butt!
i liked it, it was very real. keep posting tight piece.
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Old 09-20-2004, 12:01 AM   #5 (permalink)
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Mind~$oul will do you doggie style!Mind~$oul will do you doggie style!Mind~$oul will do you doggie style!Mind~$oul will do you doggie style!Mind~$oul will do you doggie style!Mind~$oul will do you doggie style!Mind~$oul will do you doggie style!Mind~$oul will do you doggie style!Mind~$oul will do you doggie style!Mind~$oul will do you doggie style!Mind~$oul will do you doggie style!
"This is the purest of poetry.
Knowing fully where you are
Going but not assured the safe
Trip there, and if you steer
Off course, where do you travel
From where?"

That was my favorite part man. Gave the reader a nice venting feel with this piece. A few of my favorite poems have came when i use to have to ride a bus to school or work. Uppin for you.


one luv
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Old 09-20-2004, 12:55 AM   #6 (permalink)
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BrokenSoul8604 takes it up the butt!
good looks....actually i was on a busride home from visitin fam.......5 hours alone staring at the road and fields.......what more could you ask for (exception on the stinky middle eastern lady sitting next to me)

anyways...

God Bless
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