In The Woods

BrokenSoul8604 · 09-14-2004, 01:50 AM

“A love without sighs,
Of laughterful eyes,
That reckoned each second
The pause of a kiss,
A kiss and… that is
If I were her lover to teach her.”

“Madison Julius Cawein”

I.
May I lead you to my soul in searching?
To tell you, the love of my love, that
Against my will I have fallen: I wish
Not to hear of it’s impossibility.
I’ve held a summer night in my arms,
And dove into the eyes of an angel.
Still trying to resurface, I crumble
To the story of my humble,
Crashing into a rumble: The rumble
Of a song and it’s purpose.

II.
May I lead you to my heart in hoping?
To ask you, the breath of my breath, to
Walk with me to tomorrow? I care
Not of distance, so do not speak it.
I’ll wait along the shores of Autumn,
For my burning beauty to follow.
Still trying to recover: I pour
The blood of pain from before,
Pour as rain to my door,
Towards the dawn of her shutters.

III.
May I lead you to a lake in longing?
To offer you, the eye of my eye, a life
Full of promises, in an eternal August.
We, child has spoken for us both.
I’ll breathe in the stars in our nights,
For a love half as bright.
Still trying to reminisce: Dying
In her eyes, from tomorrow’s goodbyes,
Now I scratch our names along the sky,
Trying to relive midnight’s kiss….
“ a kiss and… that is…”

BrokenSoul8604 · 09-14-2004, 01:52 AM

1st post

BrokenSoul8604 · 09-14-2004, 03:59 AM

runofthejamill · 09-14-2004, 07:15 AM

Quote:

Walk with me to tomorrow? I care
Not of distance, so do not speak it.

I really like these lines

ChingyFanatic · 09-14-2004, 12:30 PM

I didn't read it...

Is it about fucking in the woods?

Cos that can't be bad.

BrokenSoul8604 · 09-14-2004, 05:25 PM

.........?

RealMS · 09-14-2004, 07:25 PM

hmm, that was pretty good actually. I don't wanna say modern day style of writing with the thoughts gathering, but this was beyond I guess you could say, "appropriate" (something like that, hope you know what I'm trying to say)- a nice read. Makes me think about many a things I been through to keep a relationship I guess stable (I sound so old lol) and how being patient you will see, that love conquers all things<=message I got from your poem. Keep it up. On a side note, I'm not sure if you know the rule here or not, but before posting up a poem you must read 3 other poems and reply (not just a 3 word reply, but an actual reply, yeah) and also you can have only 2 poems on the first page of your own.
Anyway, I look forward to reading more of your writings.
-Much Love, & welcome

BrokenSoul8604 · 09-14-2004, 09:04 PM

i did not know the rule... but i have posted replies on a few other reads...
I will
He's Alone Again...

God bless.

SAMARA · 09-15-2004, 02:49 AM

creative piece

Quote:

Originally Posted by ChingyFanatic

I didn't read it...

Is it about fucking in the woods?

Cos that can't be bad.

{shaking my head in disbelief}

BrokenSoul8604 · 09-15-2004, 03:01 AM

Thanks for all the love on the first post... i look forward to learning something from every artist in the realm....respect.

God Bless

niniane17 · 09-16-2004, 12:19 AM

I’ve held a summer night in my arms,
And dove into the eyes of an angel.
Still trying to resurface, I crumble
(and)
I’ll wait along the shores of Autumn,
For my burning beauty to follow.
Still trying to recover: I pour
The blood of pain from before,
Pour as rain to my door,
Towards the dawn of her shutters.

these lines touched me, they really hit home. nice piece, loved the flow. keep em comin'.

Mind~$oul · 09-18-2004, 01:21 AM

Welcome to the realm. We dont have the 3 poem reply rule anymore. But you should still show people luv it you want it to be shown back.

Pretty good piece man. Seem like one of them type poems you write out in a field by yourself when the sun is setting. Lookin foward to seeing more of your work.

one luv

serioustempa · 09-19-2004, 01:20 AM

Good piece the flow was smooth and honest in expression. I really enjoy'd these line:

"May I lead you to my soul in searching?
To tell you, the love of my love, that
Against my will I have fallen: I wish
Not to hear of it’s impossibility."

"I’ll wait along the shores of Autumn,
For my burning beauty to follow.
Still trying to recover: I pour"

" Trying to relive midnight’s kiss….
“ a kiss and… that is…”"

Very strong at the end welcome to the realm!

BrokenSoul8604 · 09-19-2004, 01:21 AM

thanks much....

God Bless

MzDee · 09-19-2004, 04:07 AM

Still trying to reminisce: Dying
In her eyes, from tomorrow’s goodbyes,
Now I scratch our names along the sky,
Trying to relive midnight’s kiss….
“ a kiss and… that is…”

I loved those lines and the poem as a whole hope to read more from you

BrokenSoul8604 · 09-19-2004, 04:20 AM

thanks much hope to read from you too

god bless

ManMadeofAshes · 09-19-2004, 03:39 PM

I tried that... allnakey wouldnt let that shit go, and I don't like people making their own interpretation of my words. I tried to post else where but I think she was getting off on ignoring all of what I said. But yes, Im sort of over that converstation with her. Its hard to have an education and not get upset when people fuck with your words as if "it is what it is". I was the same way out of highschool. Maybe thats why it pisses me off, is I was like that, and than went back to school an saw what I stupid ass I was clinging my perspective like it was universal. anyway.. your peice.....

" I wait at the shores of autumn"

This line is beautiful to me. I got this image of colored leaves tumbling in the wind across a street and a long wave. (if you've ever seen that) and also just the waving of colored leaves on trees. cool imagery. # 3 was definately the strongest. I enjoyed every line in that part. Nice peice. I like the 1. 2. 3. sort of thing too. Ive done a similar thing with a poem called thoughts after birth (not posted) where I did Day 1 Week 1 Month 1 .. etc...

anyway. Nice.

-Ashes

Brit Boi Gee · 09-19-2004, 03:43 PM

this was a very nice piece, it seemed kind of cluttered in places and not a single thing leapt out at me to glance at as a whole. But I will read it again to try and understand it more. The references to august were particularly beautiful.

take care

AliuqeT · 09-19-2004, 03:54 PM

i loved it my favortie part was the end though. it was descriptive to me, and it was enjoying to read. keep it up

BrokenSoul8604 · 09-19-2004, 04:20 PM

thanks for the love ashes, brit, and aliuqeT...

God Bless

09-14-2004, 01:50 AM	#1 (permalink)
BrokenSoul8604 Apparently Emotionless Join Date: Sep 2004 Location: DMI~ Posts: 705	In The Woods “A love without sighs, Of laughterful eyes, That reckoned each second The pause of a kiss, A kiss and… that is If I were her lover to teach her.” “Madison Julius Cawein” I. May I lead you to my soul in searching? To tell you, the love of my love, that Against my will I have fallen: I wish Not to hear of it’s impossibility. I’ve held a summer night in my arms, And dove into the eyes of an angel. Still trying to resurface, I crumble To the story of my humble, Crashing into a rumble: The rumble Of a song and it’s purpose. II. May I lead you to my heart in hoping? To ask you, the breath of my breath, to Walk with me to tomorrow? I care Not of distance, so do not speak it. I’ll wait along the shores of Autumn, For my burning beauty to follow. Still trying to recover: I pour The blood of pain from before, Pour as rain to my door, Towards the dawn of her shutters. III. May I lead you to a lake in longing? To offer you, the eye of my eye, a life Full of promises, in an eternal August. We, child has spoken for us both. I’ll breathe in the stars in our nights, For a love half as bright. Still trying to reminisce: Dying In her eyes, from tomorrow’s goodbyes, Now I scratch our names along the sky, Trying to relive midnight’s kiss…. “ a kiss and… that is…” Last edited by BrokenSoul8604; 09-14-2004 at 09:02 PM.

09-14-2004, 01:52 AM	#2 (permalink)
BrokenSoul8604 Apparently Emotionless Join Date: Sep 2004 Location: DMI~ Posts: 705	1st post __________________ A poem begins as a lump in the throat, a sense of wrong, a homesickness, a lovesickness. Last edited by BrokenSoul8604; 09-14-2004 at 02:54 AM. Reason: Cause.

09-14-2004, 03:59 AM	#3 (permalink)
BrokenSoul8604 Apparently Emotionless Join Date: Sep 2004 Location: DMI~ Posts: 705	up^^ __________________ A poem begins as a lump in the throat, a sense of wrong, a homesickness, a lovesickness.

09-14-2004, 05:25 PM	#6 (permalink)
BrokenSoul8604 Apparently Emotionless Join Date: Sep 2004 Location: DMI~ Posts: 705	.........? __________________ A poem begins as a lump in the throat, a sense of wrong, a homesickness, a lovesickness.

09-14-2004, 09:04 PM	#8 (permalink)
BrokenSoul8604 Apparently Emotionless Join Date: Sep 2004 Location: DMI~ Posts: 705	i did not know the rule... but i have posted replies on a few other reads... I will He's Alone Again... God bless. __________________ A poem begins as a lump in the throat, a sense of wrong, a homesickness, a lovesickness.

09-14-2004, 07:25 PM	#7 (permalink)
RealMS Pro 31 Join Date: Feb 2004 Location: Lafayette/New Orleans, LA Posts: 4,228	hmm, that was pretty good actually. I don't wanna say modern day style of writing with the thoughts gathering, but this was beyond I guess you could say, "appropriate" (something like that, hope you know what I'm trying to say)- a nice read. Makes me think about many a things I been through to keep a relationship I guess stable (I sound so old lol) and how being patient you will see, that love conquers all things<=message I got from your poem. Keep it up. On a side note, I'm not sure if you know the rule here or not, but before posting up a poem you must read 3 other poems and reply (not just a 3 word reply, but an actual reply, yeah) and also you can have only 2 poems on the first page of your own. Anyway, I look forward to reading more of your writings. -Much Love, & welcome

09-15-2004, 03:01 AM	#10 (permalink)
BrokenSoul8604 Apparently Emotionless Join Date: Sep 2004 Location: DMI~ Posts: 705	Thanks for all the love on the first post... i look forward to learning something from every artist in the realm....respect. God Bless __________________ A poem begins as a lump in the throat, a sense of wrong, a homesickness, a lovesickness.

09-16-2004, 12:19 AM	#11 (permalink)
niniane17 Registered User Join Date: Sep 2004 Posts: 93	I’ve held a summer night in my arms, And dove into the eyes of an angel. Still trying to resurface, I crumble (and) I’ll wait along the shores of Autumn, For my burning beauty to follow. Still trying to recover: I pour The blood of pain from before, Pour as rain to my door, Towards the dawn of her shutters. these lines touched me, they really hit home. nice piece, loved the flow. keep em comin'. __________________ Niniane Memory hither come, And tune your merry notes; And while upon the wind, Your music floats, I'll pore upon the stream, Where sighing lovers dream, And fish for fancies as they pass Within the watery glass....... ----William Blake

09-18-2004, 01:21 AM	#12 (permalink)
Mind~$oul I'm Pretty Join Date: Apr 2001 Location: North Memphis BITCH! Posts: 17,145	Welcome to the realm. We dont have the 3 poem reply rule anymore. But you should still show people luv it you want it to be shown back. Pretty good piece man. Seem like one of them type poems you write out in a field by yourself when the sun is setting. Lookin foward to seeing more of your work. one luv __________________ "Everybody wanna be a nicca, but don't nobody wanna be a nicca"-Paul Mooney "I tried to live right, but society aint made for niccas to live right"-Joe Budden

09-19-2004, 01:20 AM	#13 (permalink)
serioustempa Registered User Join Date: Mar 2002 Posts: 40	Good piece the flow was smooth and honest in expression. I really enjoy'd these line: "May I lead you to my soul in searching? To tell you, the love of my love, that Against my will I have fallen: I wish Not to hear of it’s impossibility." "I’ll wait along the shores of Autumn, For my burning beauty to follow. Still trying to recover: I pour" " Trying to relive midnight’s kiss…. “ a kiss and… that is…”" Very strong at the end welcome to the realm! __________________ SUNSET...

09-19-2004, 01:21 AM	#14 (permalink)
BrokenSoul8604 Apparently Emotionless Join Date: Sep 2004 Location: DMI~ Posts: 705	thanks much.... God Bless __________________ A poem begins as a lump in the throat, a sense of wrong, a homesickness, a lovesickness.

09-19-2004, 04:07 AM	#15 (permalink)
MzDee Where Stars Fall..... Join Date: Sep 2004 Location: chucktown ,sc Posts: 58	Still trying to reminisce: Dying In her eyes, from tomorrow’s goodbyes, Now I scratch our names along the sky, Trying to relive midnight’s kiss…. “ a kiss and… that is…” I loved those lines and the poem as a whole hope to read more from you

09-19-2004, 04:20 AM	#16 (permalink)
BrokenSoul8604 Apparently Emotionless Join Date: Sep 2004 Location: DMI~ Posts: 705	thanks much hope to read from you too god bless __________________ A poem begins as a lump in the throat, a sense of wrong, a homesickness, a lovesickness.

09-19-2004, 03:39 PM	#17 (permalink)
ManMadeofAshes *DREAMER Join Date: Jun 2004 Location: at home Posts: 635	I tried that... allnakey wouldnt let that shit go, and I don't like people making their own interpretation of my words. I tried to post else where but I think she was getting off on ignoring all of what I said. But yes, Im sort of over that converstation with her. Its hard to have an education and not get upset when people fuck with your words as if "it is what it is". I was the same way out of highschool. Maybe thats why it pisses me off, is I was like that, and than went back to school an saw what I stupid ass I was clinging my perspective like it was universal. anyway.. your peice..... " I wait at the shores of autumn" This line is beautiful to me. I got this image of colored leaves tumbling in the wind across a street and a long wave. (if you've ever seen that) and also just the waving of colored leaves on trees. cool imagery. # 3 was definately the strongest. I enjoyed every line in that part. Nice peice. I like the 1. 2. 3. sort of thing too. Ive done a similar thing with a poem called thoughts after birth (not posted) where I did Day 1 Week 1 Month 1 .. etc... anyway. Nice. -Ashes

09-19-2004, 03:43 PM	#18 (permalink)
Brit Boi Gee manifest the zen Join Date: Mar 2002 Location: Near To Athena Posts: 15,977	this was a very nice piece, it seemed kind of cluttered in places and not a single thing leapt out at me to glance at as a whole. But I will read it again to try and understand it more. The references to august were particularly beautiful. take care __________________ They all laughed when I said I was going to be a comedian. They aren't laughing now. -Bob Monkhouse Brit Boi has a highly calibrated wifermometer

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09-19-2004, 03:54 PM	#19 (permalink)
AliuqeT Registered User Join Date: Jul 2004 Posts: 65	i loved it my favortie part was the end though. it was descriptive to me, and it was enjoying to read. keep it up

09-19-2004, 04:20 PM	#20 (permalink)
BrokenSoul8604 Apparently Emotionless Join Date: Sep 2004 Location: DMI~ Posts: 705	thanks for the love ashes, brit, and aliuqeT... God Bless __________________ A poem begins as a lump in the throat, a sense of wrong, a homesickness, a lovesickness.

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