Rush Hour Romances

This is a discussion on Rush Hour Romances within the Poetry Realm forums, part of the Intellect Zone category; Replied too: Dream guild Beautiful story river of the Night You’ll find beauty In all of your loneliness Sown steps ...


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Old 07-17-2004, 10:32 PM   #1 (permalink)
Sex is no fun by yourself
 
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allnakey will do you doggie style!allnakey will do you doggie style!allnakey will do you doggie style!allnakey will do you doggie style!allnakey will do you doggie style!allnakey will do you doggie style!allnakey will do you doggie style!allnakey will do you doggie style!allnakey will do you doggie style!allnakey will do you doggie style!allnakey will do you doggie style!
Rush Hour Romances

Replied too:
Dream guild
Beautiful story
river of the Night



You’ll find beauty
In all of your loneliness
Sown steps and glittered paths
We forgot to laugh at hello
It’s all the same, I said goodbye
And then ran away
Now who’s laughing...?
You’re the girl who’s all alone.

Blowing air kisses across the sky
We fell and got up, got knocked down
Then rushed to the hotel room
It’s that wonderful feeling of regret
I bet you regret feeling so wonderful
You left your game unfinished
I left your game, I’m finished
Fall out girl... it’s my turn to play

You’ll find beauty
In all of your loneliness
Cause you sat there and stared for days
At old photos of yesterday
You made mistakes, I forgave
You played with fire, results were deserved
To get your laugh out of my head
I made a choice to put on my shoes

It’s not the way I said goodbye
Cause that was a waste of my time
I hope you look in the mirror
And see the scars I left
Deep inside of you
Your photos won’t come true again
You lost your wishing star
It was all worth it... to see you cry

Forgotten apology, I couldn’t forgive
I’m not sorry for all that I did
And you’ll hate yourself,
for hating yourself
It’s not enough
I love you but...,
Not enough... to say I love you
And in the end of it all
You’ll find beauty, In all of your loneliness
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And I sat watching a flower
As it was withering
I was embarrassed by its honesty
So I'd prefer to be remembered as a smiling face
Not this fucking wreck
That's taken its place


get some balls biatch or else

Last edited by allnakey; 07-18-2004 at 10:09 AM.
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Old 07-18-2004, 06:32 PM   #2 (permalink)
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"You’ll find beauty
In all of your loneliness
Sown steps and glittered paths
We forgot to laugh at hello
It’s all the same, I said goodbye
And then ran away
Now who’s laughing...?
You’re the girl who’s all alone."

I liked this part A LOT. I can definitely relate to it... nice.


"Blowing air kisses across the sky
We fell and got up, got knocked down
Then rushed to the hotel room
It’s that wonderful feeling of regret
I bet you regret feeling so wonderful
You left your game unfinished
I left your game, I’m finished
Fall out girl... it’s my turn to play"

Haha I like how you reversed things. This was great. I can still relate to an extent... *sighs* yep. Dope.

"It’s not the way I said goodbye
Cause that was a waste of my time
I hope you look in the mirror
And see the scars I left
Deep inside of you
Your photos won’t come true again
You lost your wishing star
It was all worth it... to see you cry"

I liked this a lot too. It reminded me of my HOMOSEXUAL BITCH ASS MOTHERFUCKING DUMB WHORE OF AN EX GIRLFRIEND (sorry) a lot. I like the "It was all worth it... to see you cry" line the best. Man, I'm really fucking feeling this.

"Forgotten apology, I couldn’t forgive
I’m not sorry for all that I did
And you’ll hate yourself,
for hating yourself
It’s not enough
I love you but...,
Not enough... to say I love you
And in the end of it all
You’ll find beauty, In all of your loneliness"

Man great ass ending. I wish I could have thought of something like this. Ideas are running in my head. I think I'm going to write. The ending was cool... "I love you but...,
Not enough... to say I love you" I can definitely say that about my ex. Great, great poem yo. Best one I've read here in a while.

Thumbs the fuuuuuck up.
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Old 07-19-2004, 02:04 AM   #3 (permalink)
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ManMadeofAshes takes it up the butt!
this is real nice. Different from the style Im used to reading from you, which is obviously something that we should always be trying to do. Explore different directions. good good

Ashes
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Old 07-19-2004, 02:10 PM   #4 (permalink)
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tooshort21 takes it up the butt!
good post like quotive said i can relate very very much to this piece!!

fuckin ex wife( well techincally i cannot call her my ex yet!!)

and like ashes said it wasnt like your normal work, but you did go well with this different direction, good work
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Old 07-19-2004, 07:46 PM   #5 (permalink)
 
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BirthOfTragedy will do you doggie style!BirthOfTragedy will do you doggie style!BirthOfTragedy will do you doggie style!BirthOfTragedy will do you doggie style!BirthOfTragedy will do you doggie style!BirthOfTragedy will do you doggie style!BirthOfTragedy will do you doggie style!BirthOfTragedy will do you doggie style!BirthOfTragedy will do you doggie style!BirthOfTragedy will do you doggie style!BirthOfTragedy will do you doggie style!
Forgotten apology, I couldn’t forgive
I’m not sorry for all that I did
And you’ll hate yourself,
for hating yourself
It’s not enough
I love you but...,
Not enough... to say I love you
And in the end of it all
You’ll find beauty, In all of your loneliness''

excellent peice.
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Old 07-19-2004, 09:45 PM   #6 (permalink)
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sagacious infant will do you doggie style!sagacious infant will do you doggie style!sagacious infant will do you doggie style!sagacious infant will do you doggie style!sagacious infant will do you doggie style!sagacious infant will do you doggie style!sagacious infant will do you doggie style!sagacious infant will do you doggie style!sagacious infant will do you doggie style!sagacious infant will do you doggie style!sagacious infant will do you doggie style!
What's weird is that...when I read this it seemed as if the lines became more and more rushed as the poem progressed



Quote:
Forgotten apology, I couldn’t forgive
I’m not sorry for all that I did
And you’ll hate yourself,
for hating yourself
damn...and...damn.

good stuff!
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Old 07-20-2004, 02:59 PM   #7 (permalink)
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allnakey will do you doggie style!allnakey will do you doggie style!allnakey will do you doggie style!allnakey will do you doggie style!allnakey will do you doggie style!allnakey will do you doggie style!allnakey will do you doggie style!allnakey will do you doggie style!allnakey will do you doggie style!allnakey will do you doggie style!allnakey will do you doggie style!
Quote:
Originally Posted by ManMadeofAshes
this is real nice. Different from the style Im used to reading from you, which is obviously something that we should always be trying to do. Explore different directions. good good

Ashes

Nah this aint much different from all my other keystyles... maybe cause this one is about love and I aint wrote on that topic in a while... But not to different. Anyways thanks for the props man
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And I sat watching a flower
As it was withering
I was embarrassed by its honesty
So I'd prefer to be remembered as a smiling face
Not this fucking wreck
That's taken its place


get some balls biatch or else
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Old 07-20-2004, 04:28 PM   #8 (permalink)
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This was inspirational right here. I was likin how you ended on a positive note too. This was really tight. You write very deeply and in a way that keeps interest all the way through. Keep the ink flowin...peace.
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Old 07-21-2004, 12:28 AM   #9 (permalink)
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i love your stuff always.....i liked the repetition of the "youll find beauty...."

bravo =)
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Old 07-21-2004, 06:08 PM   #10 (permalink)
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"I’m not sorry for all that I did
And you’ll hate yourself,
for hating yourself
It’s not enough
I love you but...,
Not enough... to say I love you
"

This was my favorite part of the poem. You never let me down.

one luv
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Old 07-22-2004, 02:55 PM   #11 (permalink)
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Blowing air kisses across the sky
We fell and got up, got knocked down
Then rushed to the hotel room
It’s that wonderful feeling of regret
I bet you regret feeling so wonderful
You left your game unfinished
I left your game, I’m finished
Fall out girl... it’s my turn to play

^^^^^
whats left to say?
i dont know what to expect from you just yet,
cuz your diversity still always suprises me
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Old 07-22-2004, 11:35 PM   #12 (permalink)
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this was nice man..i like the topic....

kinda feels like your the one whos hurt the most though..

after a break up i'd always wonder if the girl missed me...if she wanted to call or write me..shit like that...thats what this reminds me of

very nice man...always plesure to read your work

O

end was nice 2..
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Old 07-23-2004, 05:32 AM   #13 (permalink)
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good piece man.
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Old 07-23-2004, 01:35 PM   #14 (permalink)
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this was a nice piece very reflective and thought provoking. I liked the kisses being blown across the sky part.
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Old 07-23-2004, 03:38 PM   #15 (permalink)
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I love you but...,
Not enough... to say I love you


that bit was dope... I really like this, nice read no doubt.
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Old 07-25-2004, 05:35 AM   #16 (permalink)
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shadygrady takes it up the butt!
i agree with malosivich on this one

love isnt enough sometimes... its almost like something is still missing, a purpose or reason beyond love....

good piece once again nakey..

rep points
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Old 07-29-2004, 02:50 PM   #17 (permalink)
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You write very well man... jesus
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Old 07-29-2004, 05:00 PM   #18 (permalink)
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Black Liquid takes it up the butt!
i can tell that felt good to write! game over! i like how the situations in the beginnin turned out like the opposite........game over........ flip......flip......flip......check my shit out if you get a chance
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Old 08-01-2004, 02:25 AM   #19 (permalink)
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*Hott Chocolate* takes it up the butt!
i really liked this piece. my favorite part was:

"You’ll find beauty
In all of your loneliness
Cause you sat there and stared for days
At old photos of yesterday
You made mistakes, I forgave
You played with fire, results were deserved
To get your laugh out of my head
I made a choice to put on my shoes"

ur a really good writer!
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