to the women in my life

[flaco_rivera]

your body is your temple
baby girl you can keep so simple
I said what I meant to
because I know what you went through
you don’t have to dumb yourself down
to be with a guy
or change your wardrobe
cuz you think that’s the key to his eye
you gotta understand that he’s feeding you lines
and he speaks when he lies
you don’t have to wear short skirts tight shirts
or barely there bra’s
when its not based on truth
love always falls
when he wants to have sex
that’s when he calls
when he’s running his game
that’s when he balls
you don’t have to lower your standards
or cheapen your value
down to a buck
cuz than the only thing you are
is only a fuck
there’s nothing wrong with being honest
or dressing modest
and don’t think your less than a goddess
don’t let anyone tell you what your worth
or tell you you’re the worse
when your truly the best
and if he talks to you
with his eyes glued to your chest
you should walk to the right
when he looks to the left
if your looking for a good guy
subtract 50 million and take a look at the rest
he should give you a hug before a kiss
he should never bawl up his fist
no matter how pissed
don’t let society portray you as weak
when you’ve always been strong
cuz you raised a generation of babies
when fathers were gone
and gave music to children
cuz you fathered a song
you sung us to sleep
and hushed little babies
so we wouldn’t make a peep
head of the household in family of sixes
and if you cook the meal
he should do dishes
he may do work
but you go through labor
and don’t forget
it was a woman
who gave birth to our savior
behind every great man is a good woman
and behind every good woman
is a

[S. Issue]

i like what is being told of here. the sentiment is there, but you need to rid your poetry of the cliche. the strife and all that, its very powerful, but you need to find ways to get that across without being a total cliche. though you could use some image work and help just working through the mechanics, you could still really improve on this by eliminating the cliche phrases.

[4Matt]

it was cool.