Painted stories of life

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Old 08-30-2006, 06:34 PM   #1 (permalink)
"one of the roughs,"
 
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HILARIONSOUL takes it up the butt!
Painted stories of life

Painted stories of life



wake forth the day of all has sprung,
poetry is in a picture blooms .
The moons bright light like the sun,
I began writing back in the years of the son,
I see life as the last thing in the national fight,
it’s alright -is it.
Life changes call it evolution
The misfits visit the dark lake by the fence of broken delusions
I closed my thoughts and open my mind.
It’s sublime! The mind.
The light that shines
bright in some sons and daughters
hot like the sun but cool like the moon
both created for lights vitality.
When the fool who holds the tool besieged the rule.
“Thou shalt not kill,” but hell blinded the fool, death is his reality.
I think I heard mother speak of that while in the womb
I felt pain, dreamed of the same then I became
Closing my eyes falling to my knees never to beg
but to plead to the almighty for me becoming.
It’s all I see.
The rainbows in the sea
above the clouds where waves take rain form
and waterfalls blast sufferings away
its’s a new day. A few say, the poetry’s in the sky
seeing doves fly
same for me as I-
write this to receive multiple replies,
I sigh!
Pause for a minute, the words I read in the system is uplifting
I feel the misfits
I witness to obey the profits
and pray for those who false to what is,
the same thing from which is- is that of what isn’t
no sense makes it,
pay attention!
GOD is not here in sight, so questions ask of who he is
read the bible or even take a breath, in you, will find him.
I’m Hilarion here in poetry form
a new style adorned by a queen -praised by a king,
I awake from a dream.
That is why I write with a new being.
I am now seeing.
Painted Stories of life.
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Old 08-31-2006, 01:37 PM   #2 (permalink)
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end was dope..thought you really did a good job pulling everything together...

i liked the overall cocept of this piece but i thought it faded for a moment twords the middle when you said something about getting replies...all in all a pretty good piece...

thanks for the read
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Old 08-31-2006, 02:42 PM   #3 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by HILARIONSOUL
Painted stories of life

The misfits visit the dark lake by the fence of broken delusions
I closed my thoughts and open my mind.
It’s sublime! The mind.
The light that shines
bright in some sons and daughters
hot like the sun but cool like the moon
both created for lights vitality.
When the fool who holds the tool besieged the rule.
“Thou shalt not kill,” but hell blinded the fool, death is his reality.


^^Loved These..

This Was Really Well Organized. For Some Reason I Think That This Would Sound Soo Much Better Read Live. I Like Alot Though..


Bless.
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Old 08-31-2006, 08:08 PM   #4 (permalink)
"one of the roughs,"
 
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HILARIONSOUL takes it up the butt!
Oh Yeah!
Thank you!
It is just a better picture for me
than just seeing it as the hood, hoes, and niggaz
trying to survive and raise a family in the slums..
i see as you have read it. thanks...Yeah


Quote:
Originally Posted by Definit_
^^Loved These..

This Was Really Well Organized. For Some Reason I Think That This Would Sound Soo Much Better Read Live. I Like Alot Though..


Bless.
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Old 09-05-2006, 11:17 AM   #5 (permalink)
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I’m Hilarion here in poetry form
a new style adorned by a queen -praised by a king,
I awake from a dream.
That is why I write with a new being.


^^^definitely my favorite line in this drop. Although I felt that some of the lines did not need to be in the poem. Kinda like your thought patter diffted off there for a hot second. But i did love the structure and concept of this piece.
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Old 09-15-2006, 02:06 AM   #6 (permalink)
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Man this was a wild poem man. It jumped from one thing to the next. I can tell this was something you was venting on. The imagery in this piece was insane and the ending was probably the strongest part to me. I do feel like some lines could have been left out though. Nonetheless, I enjoyed the read

One luv
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Old 09-20-2006, 12:56 PM   #7 (permalink)
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The Best Poem I've Read All Day!!!!

man I must have overlooked you are something....this was niiiice.....ha.....reminds me of a dream I once had....are maybe it was real.....seeing rainbows in the ocean....the birds....ahhhh man you killed me with this one


I love it


wake forth the day of all has sprung,
poetry is in a picture blooms .
The moons bright light like the sun,
I began writing back in the years of the son,
I see life as the last thing in the national fight,
it’s alright -is it.
Life changes call it evolution
The misfits visit the dark lake by the fence of broken delusions


^intro kind of grabs the reader right from the get go....wake forth the day?!?!!....who starts a poem like that......HA......how you going to wake up the day I love that metaphor.......poetry does bloom I love that line as well....reminds me of Charles Bukowski (def poet)....when he said "it is funereal and graceful and glad like the opening of flowers"......and thats what this poem started out like....the opening of a flower....you are about to open your soul....and bloom......the part about evolution as natural....interesting and how misfits are never happy trapped in their ways perhaps....that broken delusion line was like when a rollercoster drops down



I closed my thoughts and open my mind.
It’s sublime! The mind.
The light that shines
bright in some sons and daughters
hot like the sun but cool like the moon
both created for lights vitality.
When the fool who holds the tool besieged the rule.
“Thou shalt not kill,” but hell blinded the fool, death is his reality.
I think I heard mother speak of that while in the womb
I felt pain, dreamed of the same then I became
Closing my eyes falling to my knees never to beg
but to plead to the almighty for me becoming.


^and here goes the loop to loop....ah HA!!!!.....I close my thoughts and open my mind!?!?!?!?.....hold up that was tight.....you have this absract touched mastered...and yet at the same time it flows so vividly and fraglie at the same time....like a flower....the sons and moons and the mind shines....fraglie stuff.....mind you....but you flip these everyday cliches and make them your own....ahhh thats so hard to do.....the imagery from being in your mothers womb to closing your eyes and falling to your knees was something else......now thats some powerful and I speak my words truthly


It’s all I see.
The rainbows in the sea
above the clouds where waves take rain form
and waterfalls blast sufferings away
its’s a new day. A few say, the poetry’s in the sky
seeing doves fly
same for me as I-
write this to receive multiple replies,
I sigh!
Pause for a minute, the words I read in the system is uplifting
I feel the misfits
I witness to obey the profits
and pray for those who false to what is,
the same thing from which is- is that of what isn’t
no sense makes it,
pay attention!


^my favorite part....any poet that uses RAINBOWS in a poem I gotta give daps.......man......the poetrys in the sky!!?!?!?!?.....I witness to obey the profits.....no sense makes it.....PAY ATTENTION....LOL!!!....you sound like a drunken master or a angery teacher going off....remind me so much of Chylltryant back when he was the abstract wordplay king


GOD is not here in sight, so questions ask of who he is
read the bible or even take a breath, in you, will find him.
I’m Hilarion here in poetry form
a new style adorned by a queen -praised by a king,
I awake from a dream.
That is why I write with a new being.
I am now seeing.
Painted Stories of life.
__________________


^alas you touched on the issue at hand....."GOD" is in each of us...the breathe we breath ....the poetry in the sky if you will.....read the bible or even....HA there it is "TAKE A BREATH"....I love this!!!!.....in you......

this is like Jay Z in his prime allow me to reintroduce myself they call me

"HILARION here in poetry form".....lol......adorned by a queen and praised by a king....I cant help but grin as I read this.....the climax takes the rollercoster ride home....and I had so much fun reading this....the wordplay gave me goosebumps and your freefall flow awoken the coc•••• butterflys in my stomach......

it was all a dream

.................wake up.........heres were you bring it full circle....."painted stories of life".....really thats all a dream is....hahahaha....oh snap you sick with it I will never under estimate you again




THANK YOU FOR INSPIRING ME WHEN I FELT SO DOWN AND I DIDNT KNOW WHY


you found that magic I've been looking for....so rare
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Old 09-20-2006, 05:33 PM   #8 (permalink)
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i'm really feeling this.....and all the messages included in it
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Old 09-21-2006, 12:59 PM   #9 (permalink)
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Poetical Techniquez takes it up the butt!
That part ~WORDZ~ quoted i think was the best part of the poem cuz the rhythm, rhyme scheme and the way it was worded just to me captured the essence of the poem...this was enjoyable...me personally i like how u kinda said things outta order at times....it didn't feel right but it did..more so did than didn't (or as u would've said in tha poem "did so more than didn't)...anyway nice joint
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Old 09-25-2006, 02:45 AM   #10 (permalink)
"one of the roughs,"
 
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HILARIONSOUL takes it up the butt!
You all are special writers!
i love coming here out the blue and reading thoughts of uplifting and relaxing poems.
I have been busy and sorry it too much that i can't come and reply and read more great poems here. I just want everyoone to know, that you guies and lovely ladies are real... Thank you for the read everyone...
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