Note: Long read - (COMING OUT IN AUDIO SOON)
R.I.P: - Jade Heart - I Always will love you.
[
K r i m i n a L ]
The encounter
I remember that day i first met you, you were in the library
and i was the new kid, everything to me was quiet-scary.
i was looking through the shelves trying to find a certain text
and then the next, few moments that happened i'll never forget
I saw you at the computer, working on some music assignment
and this may sound like a lie but, when you had your eye's shut
trying to think, too me you looked just like heaven personified
and on my life, i have never seen such a beautiful thing in my eyes
I walked over to the bookshelf that was nearer to the computer,
as i was staring, someone said "Yeah, that's Jade, pretty cute, huh?"
Laughing, i said "hell yeah she is", Then was a punch to my ribs,
because the guy i admitted it too also happened to love you to bits.
Then he grabbed my throat, and whispered into my ears.
"Let me make this clear, She's my girlfriend - dont get no ideas"
After pushing me away, that whole thing went un-noticed
but kno this, the look in his eyes were more like cold slits.
He never had a heart, in all honesty i never think he loved you
it was more of a standards thing, showing how "good" he could do
so a week or two passed, i started making alot of friends, but..
i couldn't get your picture out of my head, even with my mind shut
So i asked around, bout some girl named "jade", yeah i was afraid
that your boyfriend would find out that i'd been asking ya age,
where ya live, what you do, how you were out of school.
But i really think that love is simply just acting like a fool.
Then one day, you were on the same bus as me, but you were crying
i came over, asked what's wrong and you replied "I feel like dying"
i shook my head and said - "Naw, heaven's too full of angels at the moment"
[ oh great lee, that was real smooth - way to go ... you've blown it ]
She laughed with tears in her eyes, and i smiled "hi my names Lee"
..'Yeah i know you, we're in the same class for history, remember me?'
"Sure do, Jade ... right? or do angel's get a different name from god"
and we got talking like that, in one moment, and it may seem odd.
But we grew close, her boyfriend was cheating on her and she left him
Just because some other girl would put out, and Jade' never "Let in"
We started hanging around, alot - it got attention all over my campus
her ex promised me a beating, to "protect his pride" just like a man does
The Start Relationship
* Beat change - P.Diddy. - "is this the end"*
Jade and me, we went through all the bad and good times
and too some, the parts that aint special - you should hide
But i remember when we were walking along on the beach
holding hands, but yet - too me, she was still out of reach
Emotionally, she was destroyed. Her ex boyfriend cheated
Her step-dad, hated the fact she was pretty, so he beated,
her just to stop her from being pretty, and it's such a pity
because if i ever saw that faggot now, i'd ask him to hit me
That way what i'd do to him would be classified - "Self defence"
and knowing that a guy would never hit her should of been a "Safety fence"
but it wasn't, she couldn't trust guy's neither emotionally or physically.
and when i'd buy her something, she'd always ask "Why", Are you kidding me
The Relationship
* Beat change - A.Keys, Usher. - "My Boo"*
Things between me and her, they couldn't of been better
from flirting and kissing to just writing her an obscene Letter,
Writing all the special sorts of things that i'd really like to do
She said - "the best day of my life was the one when i started liking you"
I'd hold her hand at the moment's when she took my breath away
and that was pretty much all the time, so i was holding it all day.
I never stopped smiling, and never let her see a moment wasted,
"MmMm Strawberry lip gloss - probably the best one that i've tasted"
And when i was down, she knew what it was that would pick me up
when we went to the movies - she'd always pick, coz what i'd pick would suck
and the food i'd cook, she always told me was great before she'd eat it
so i never knew if it was great, or if to her - it was like trying to eat shit
Her picture on my bed-side table, now watches me when i sleep
probably just returning the favour of what i'd do, all day of all week
i always whispered things in her ears, when she had her eyes closed
and then, with just one moment - my whole life froze.
The death
*Beat change - M. Mathers - Toy Soldiers*
8:05PM
You called up on my phone, just tell me that you love me so much
i replied - "you know that i love you more Jade, so hush"
Just finished work, i got changed and i was on my way too see you
then the next hours in my life - are just so painfully see through
(( Lines starting with .. mean she's talking ))
*No music*
".. Lee, dont worry bout coming to get me, Tony's take me to the party"
" Dont you want me too?"
".. of course, but for you to come is Just too far lee"
"Okay, well do you want me to bring you anything, coz im going home first"
".. No Just hurry up, because talking on the phone hurts"
"How?"
".. because i get to her that sexy voice, but i can't see you now"
[Laughing]
"Okay, well i'll hurry up because i can't wait too see you, I love you baby"
".. i love you more lee, just the thought of being with you drives me crazy"
[hang up]
I got to the party, everyone was having a great time,
word on the grapevine, was that tony had a "great ride"
Sarcasm - his car was a piece of shit, always breaking down
and every waking hour, i have - is now fully taken out
Because i called her phone, then his, then hers and no pick up
friends joking behind me - "tony's probably getting his dick sucked"
and as much as i love you, at that moment - i was secretly scared
all i thought was you with tony - backseat - in just your underwear
And yeah, i thought that - all through the night - and you never showed
and what happened between you and him - no-one will ever known
woke up the next morning, and i went home i was screaming mad
burst in the door ... and thats when i seen my dad.
He looked at me, burst into tears and said - "oh my god im sorry"
and words' cant describe the worry that i started to feel on me
"What do you mean sorry, why what have you done"
" Go to the hospital lee, i want you to go and meet your mum"
So i flew there, my wheels suddenly had wings, i thought why
mum's in hospital, dad's crying - she was probably gonna die,
then i, thought - wait ... if mum's in hospital, dad would be there too
when i got into the ward, all i could see was this blonde hair-do
I recognised it, a pony tail - with black streaks, and a hairband i bought her
i looked around, my mum, and her parents mourning, over her daughter,
and i broke down and cried, i was hurt so much, i didnt understand
i said nothing, just broke down ... walked over and too hold her hand
__________
I dont wanna carry on with that anymore, it's welcome to feedback, but i dont care what you say, This is my way of saying goodbye, she died over a year ago, today is the anniversary.
12-25-2005, 01:54 AM
)) ... and thanx for that man, i know what you goin through losin a best friend, shit suckz, but ya know - ya can't let it get the best of you, Just remember - we all gotta die one day, and we can see that person in heaven when we do. 
Linear Mode
