TMNT gets shitted on by critics.......

[i Luv Da Cock]

hahaahahah owned....looks like I made the right decision by not seeing this. ugh.


CRITICS' REVIEWS

SOURCE RATING THE GIST

NEGATIVE REVIEWS FOR TMNT

Austin Chronicle 1 star/4 "… the overall look of this animated feature is murky and dull."
Chicago Tribune 1 star/4 "… lame, cold, ugly-spirited and hard on the eyes …"
TV Guide N/A "… this go-for-broke overhaul has stripped away its entertaining charm."
USA Today 1½ stars/4 "… it takes more than an awkward title attempting to sound cool to overcome its mundane plot and silly dialogue."

MIXED REVIEWS FOR TMNT

Entertainment Weekly N/A "… missing the goofy excitement of the old 'TMNT.' "
Hollywood Reporter N/A "… stakes out no new ground for the highly profitable franchise."
Los Angeles Times N/A "… the filmmakers seem to expect us to take this animated romp seriously. Too seriously."
The New York Times N/A "… our superheroes on the half shell have been firmly co-opted by the industry their creators once sought to spoof."
Variety N/A "… pic lacks the personality that made these animated action figures so appealing 20 years ago."
The Village Voice N/A "… light on the LOL factor, heavy on the ADD action scenes, and, like, TOOIFM (Totally Out Of Its Freakin' Mind)."

Who's in It: The voices of Chris Evans, Sarah Michelle Gellar, Mako, Kevin Smith, Patrick Stewart, Laurence Fishburne, Ziyi Zhang
The Basics: Now that the kids who grew up with the Turtles the first time around are having babies of their own, they decided to make the pizza-eating crime fighters detached, depressed and needing space to work out their "issues." I'm not making any of that up, either, by the way. Even April's boyfriend has newfound commitment problems. I spent the first part of this movie wondering who they'd made it for. But then the shelled ones start battling the Foot Clan, and it more or less rights itself.

What's the Deal? I knew the toys and the TV show were hot again, so it was a matter of time before they dusted this off and made a new film version. And really, since it was inevitable — and even more inevitable that it'd be animated instead of dorky-but-amiable live-action — and further, easily assumed that it'd be by-the-numbers in the plot department, at least they went and made it look nice. It's almost a kid noir since it all happens at night and in sewers. And the CG is so depth-y, it's like watching a 3D movie. It makes the first Shrek look primitive by comparison.

You Know What Kids Love? Irony! Well, you'd think they did from watching this, anyway. When "cowabunga" is reduced to a kind of in-joke instead of assuming its rightful place as a ridiculous dialogue staple, you know you're in for a movie that, as I mentioned earlier, is twisting itself into a pretzel to appeal to parents, too. And I always thought movies like this were made so that parents could have a little nap while the kids enjoyed themselves.

What's Good About It: I kind of liked the 13 monsters unleashed on the city that the turtles have to battle. They're forbidding, well-designed and memorable. And the fighting scenes are definite kid-pleasers. Also, it's also the perfect vehicle for an actor like Zhang to continue practicing English. It sure beats throwing her into something like Memoirs of a Geisha.

Weirdest Corporate Synergy of 2007: In this Warner Bros. movie, the rat guru Splinter's hobby is "watching [his] stories." To demonstrate this, he turns on the TV and the CW show Gilmore Girls is on.

[Graphx]

I actually liked it...it was entertaining and just fun to watch...and I went with my younger siblings and the theater was packed with kids and it was a cool experience seeing the kids of today enjoy it as much as I did at their age...kinda made me feel old though lol...o well, I'm only 20

[Nanijah]

I'm not reading all that. But like I said, it wasn't the greatest because of the animation. But if you are a REAL TMNT fan, you can appreicate it. It was a great plot and a great movie. I saw it with my boys and they really enjoyed it as well.

[KEALYBOY]

lazy whore

[i Luv Da Cock]

Originally Posted by Graphx

I actually liked it...it was entertaining and just fun to watch...and I went with my younger siblings and the theater was packed with kids and it was a cool experience seeing the kids of today enjoy it as much as I did at their age...kinda made me feel old though lol...o well, I'm only 20

Honestly how the fuck does this work?

I'm 20 this year, and I don't see how a 5-6 year old in the early 90s could appreciate or get a kick out of the ninja turtles because really, we're too fucking young to be on the bandwagon. It was the kids who were 8-10 years old who can truly appreciate that shit, the kids who were actually old enough to find it amusing.

When I was 5 years old, I wasn't watching the Ninja Turtles. I was born in 1987, jesus christ, TMNT reached their peaks in 1990 when the first movie came. I remember seeing like two episodes of the cartoons. Like I said, I was just too young to remember it. So I don't see how if you're the same age as me, you can have a place for that shit in your heart.

U know what the big thing was when I was growing up? Power Rangers. Mighty Fuckin Morphin Power Rangers. THAT was the shit to remember because it was 1994, the same age where TMNT fans were at during Turtle prime. Not 5-6 year olds. When you're 5 and 6 you experience it but you're still too young to TRULY be a part of it. It's like, borderline past your time kind of thing.

[Nanijah]

^ Well I'm 25 and enjoyed it! I was around when the whole Ninja Turtle craze was here. I LOVED TMNT when I was a kid, watched the cartoon's ALL the damn time.

So I say this movie was great. Once you got over the animation. Which was easy. Since it was really nice to see the turtles on the big screen again ;o)

I was also a huge fan of Power Ranger. Up until they added all those other colour's. I like the ORIGINAL power rangers. With Kim and Zack and whatever the other's were lol.

[Ethan Albright]

You're reading critiques on a Ninja Turtles movie?



seriously....



just watch the damned movie. If you liked ninja turtles, you'll like this. But don't expect some nerdy critics to say anything good about it or anything else like it. You gonna read critiques on the Trans-Formers movie too?

[i Luv Da Cock]

Originally Posted by Nanijah

^ Well I'm 25 and enjoyed it! I was around when the whole Ninja Turtle craze was here. I LOVED TMNT when I was a kid, watched the cartoon's ALL the damn time.

So I say this movie was great. Once you got over the animation. Which was easy. Since it was really nice to see the turtles on the big screen again ;o)

I was also a huge fan of Power Ranger. Up until they added all those other colour's. I like the ORIGINAL power rangers. With Kim and Zack and whatever the other's were lol.

Yes the original PR was the SHIZ! Jason, Zack, Billy, Kim, and Trini.

once that cunt green ranger was added, it ruined the show from then on.

RIP Thuy Trang aka Yellow Ranger, by the way.

[Graphx]

Originally Posted by Red-Master

Honestly how the fuck does this work?

I'm 20 this year, and I don't see how a 5-6 year old in the early 90s could appreciate or get a kick out of the ninja turtles because really, we're too fucking young to be on the bandwagon. It was the kids who were 8-10 years old who can truly appreciate that shit, the kids who were actually old enough to find it amusing.

When I was 5 years old, I wasn't watching the Ninja Turtles. I was born in 1987, jesus christ, TMNT reached their peaks in 1990 when the first movie came. I remember seeing like two episodes of the cartoons. Like I said, I was just too young to remember it. So I don't see how if you're the same age as me, you can have a place for that shit in your heart.

U know what the big thing was when I was growing up? Power Rangers. Mighty Fuckin Morphin Power Rangers. THAT was the shit to remember because it was 1994, the same age where TMNT fans were at during Turtle prime. Not 5-6 year olds. When you're 5 and 6 you experience it but you're still too young to TRULY be a part of it. It's like, borderline past your time kind of thing.

I dunno holmes...I popped out in 86 but I remember it all...I still have all the VHS tapes in a box in the attic...sittin next to a box full of action figures...and pictures galore with the halloween costumes and weapons and all that good shit...I remember VIVDLY sittin down watchin the cartoons and goin crazy over the movie cuz it was live action...and seein em all in theaters...the series made me join martial arts myself at 7 years old lol..

I mean, I'm not sitting here like an obsessed fanboy (even tho I was) trying to say its the best shit on earth...but it was most def. the biggest show/movie and toy kick of my childhood, and I remember it all...and thats after the pounds and pounds of weed I've blown hahaha

[Graphx]

Speaking on the Power Rangers...anyone remember when that shit used to come on at 7 am...then finally got switched to 5pm...I used to get up before school everyday and watch that shit lol

oh yeah, and ya notice how the black ranger was...black? Yellow ranger was...asian?

[i Luv Da Cock]

Originally Posted by Graphx

I dunno holmes...I popped out in 86 but I remember it all...I still have all the VHS tapes in a box in the attic...sittin next to a box full of action figures...and pictures galore with the halloween costumes and weapons and all that good shit...I remember VIVDLY sittin down watchin the cartoons and goin crazy over the movie cuz it was live action...and seein em all in theaters...the series made me join martial arts myself at 7 years old lol..

I mean, I'm not sitting here like an obsessed fanboy (even tho I was) trying to say its the best shit on earth...but it was most def. the biggest show/movie and toy kick of my childhood, and I remember it all...and thats after the pounds and pounds of weed I've blown hahaha

yea see ur one of those rare kids who were young but still got into it.

but u were like, what 4 years old when the first movie came out right?

I was 3 years old when the first movie came out in 1990. So for me, I don't see how somebody that young can really get into it the way a 7-10 year old can.

[i Luv Da Cock]

Originally Posted by Graphx

oh yeah, and ya notice how the black ranger was...black? Yellow ranger was...asian?

hahaahh yes that was some messed up typecasting

even when they came out in 93, i was in grade one, the kids noticed the subtle "racial" tones of how the black ranger was played a black guy.

Yellow Ranger was asian (RIP thuy trang) so that was fucked up too.

I guess they finally removed Zack and the "Black Ranger" character tho, cuz in the later versions, he was replaced by green or white.

But u know what's weird? I just, for some reason, Jason is the red ranger right? I take it further cuz, to me, he looks Native American. Lol. U know how some Native Americans who have mixed heritages like they're part white, part native and shit? and Jason the red ranger looked kinda native indian.

[i Luv Da Cock]

But the later shows weren't as racially fucekd up

TJ Johnson was the red ranger and he was black....he was the leader in Power Rangers Turbo the series

i used to watch that shit too, along with Big Bad beetleborgs around late 96?

[Graphx]

LMAO @ picturing the red ranger goin crazy on Rita with a tomahawk or bow&arrow

On some Turok shit

[i Luv Da Cock]

the resemblance is staggering.

[Nanijah]

Originally Posted by Graphx

Speaking on the Power Rangers...anyone remember when that shit used to come on at 7 am...then finally got switched to 5pm...I used to get up before school everyday and watch that shit lol

oh yeah, and ya notice how the black ranger was...black? Yellow ranger was...asian?

I remember that! We also use to get up early to watch. But was glad when they moved it to 5pm. We were addicted to that show.

My kids now like the newer one. I myself can't get into it.

[Charlieoflac]

Ima go see this today.