Those that are married or in a serious relationship..

[Nanijah]

Originally Posted by samii so sexii

thank you!! ok, wanna know a secret? That same summer, where we linked back up, I swear to the Lord above, every single night that we sat outside when we were having those deep conversations, we would see shooting stars.

and sometimes not just one...sometimes two or three a night. now, i don't live in the mountains...i live in the valley of so cal...our view of the stars isn't that great given pollution, city lights, ect. but i promise, every single night that summer, we would see shooting stars together. and i was soo weirded out by it. i googled if any meteor showers were going on, or what was happening...i couldn't find anything...

everytime i tell people that though, they think im crazy, or full of it. but it happened...so, i know he's "the one" [lol sidebar: i hate that phrase "the one" idk why...]

I feel you too about not asking. i had him get down on one knee right before we left to get married, but he didnt "propose"...we just agreed thats what we wanted and we did it lol

I believe it!!! :o) Not sure why anyone would want to make that kind of thing up, lol. Which I think is an amazing story!!! It feels good when you've found love like that, doesn't it? Congrats again!

I'm not crazy on the term "one" either. Only because I don't think there's only always going to be "one" for us. Things happen in life, we grow old etc etc. You know where I'm going with that...


Yeah I can't even remember when we decided we were going to get married. I just know it was when I was 16, lol. I remember we decided on a date and everything. We made sure it was planned when I was 18 and just went with it. It was even a shock to our parents. They had no idea how serious we were. We ended up having my son in July 99 and we kept telling our parents we were going to get married--they brushed it off. They finally took us serious two weeks before the date (Aug 99) we had picked to get married LOL So it was a small, but nice wedding planned in 2 weeks!! Crazy how it all happened so fast. I don't even remember much about it, that's how fast it happen (plus the fact it was 10yrs ago LOL).

[Ignorant]

Originally Posted by Brit Boi Gee

generally speaking, sounding like a rapist doesn't impress the ladies

and you had to throw in a pinch of desperation for good measure.

You're trying too hard.

Calling me a jerk does nothing to increase your pussy consumption.

I still get mines and you're still hopeless and lonely trying to woo women with self apologies and male guilt.

[Brit Boi Gee]

I was being serious; you sounded like a creepy-rapist. Imagine sounding like a creepy rapist and not even knowing it and you will have a pretty accurate objective account of yourself and why you continually show that you don't have a fucking clue about know how to converse with women, that much is obvious.

[Ignorant]

Originally Posted by Brit Boi Gee

I was being serious; you sounded like a creepy-rapist. Imagine sounding like a creepy rapist and not even knowing it and you will have a pretty accurate objective account of yourself and why you continually show that you don't have a fucking clue about know how to converse with women, that much is obvious.

I know you were... which is why you're trying too hard.

You're trying to police me and you're coming across as desperate in the process.

If you're serious and I'm laughing at you and pitying you, then who really looks the worst?

[samii so sexii]

Originally Posted by Nanijah

I believe it!!! :o) Not sure why anyone would want to make that kind of thing up, lol. Which I think is an amazing story!!! It feels good when you've found love like that, doesn't it? Congrats again!

I'm not crazy on the term "one" either. Only because I don't think there's only always going to be "one" for us. Things happen in life, we grow old etc etc. You know where I'm going with that...


Yeah I can't even remember when we decided we were going to get married. I just know it was when I was 16, lol. I remember we decided on a date and everything. We made sure it was planned when I was 18 and just went with it. It was even a shock to our parents. They had no idea how serious we were. We ended up having my son in July 99 and we kept telling our parents we were going to get married--they brushed it off. They finally took us serious two weeks before the date (Aug 99) we had picked to get married LOL So it was a small, but nice wedding planned in 2 weeks!! Crazy how it all happened so fast. I don't even remember much about it, that's how fast it happen (plus the fact it was 10yrs ago LOL).

lol i dun like saying "the one" because im corny enough as is...i dun need extra help looking like a lame LoL

I think its so cute that you guys have been together so long. You give me hope! LoL

my one year anniversary is coming up in a little more than a month and I'm blown away by how fast this year has passed. I can only imagine what 10 years must feel like to you...its probably all a blur!


how have you maintained a healthy relationship all these years?

[Nanijah]

Originally Posted by samii so sexii

lol i dun like saying "the one" because im corny enough as is...i dun need extra help looking like a lame LoL

I think its so cute that you guys have been together so long. You give me hope! LoL

my one year anniversary is coming up in a little more than a month and I'm blown away by how fast this year has passed. I can only imagine what 10 years must feel like to you...its probably all a blur!


how have you maintained a healthy relationship all these years?

It does fly by! I still can't believe we've hit the 10yr mark. It just doesn't seem like it's possible. I'll have been with him for 13yrs this coming March. Which is even crazier to me LOL


Our relationship has been up and down lol Like any marriage I guess. We have our rough spots, and we have our great moments. It's definitely a struggle at times and takes a lot of work. I don't care who says marriage is a breeze, they're full of shit lol. I think around year 4-5 we hit it rough. Forget that 7yr itch. The 4-5yr was a bitch. I thought for sure we were headed for splits ville. But both of us believe in marriage as a one time deal and it's not something you can just toss away (thank God for that).


I will say tho, the one shitty thing about getting married so young. Is that we've both grown into two different people over the years. We aren't the same people who got married 10yrs ago. That's a struggle that we're still working on. More so since he worked out of town from June-October and only home on weekends. First time I spent alone and doing what I wanted to do. It was nice and really showed me who I was as a person---it's complicated to explain. But that has made things a little tense right now---but again it's something we'll work through and hopefully just another one of those humps that you look back and say "really glad we over came that together" type deals :o)

He can be a pain in my ass sometimes, but I love him!!



Any big plans for the first anniversary?

[Brit Boi Gee]

hardly trying to "police" anyone. just cant hold a straight face when I witness the wanabee lady-killer with that swagger of desperation thinking he's somewhat of a hit with women while getting continual knockbacks.

[samii so sexii]

Nani:

That makes total sense. But the advantage that I think that comes with marriage at a young age is that you're flexible. Even though you two are different now than you were 13 years ago, because you grew together, I think you're more willing to compromise.

Whereas, if you were 45 and already had kids that were way grown, and some guy expected you to go hella out your way, you may not be trying to bend for someone like that...especially after many failed relationships. So I think we have it pretty good =]

I hear that the two main important things are communication & compromise. I think the other thing that is paramount is love. Because I love my husband, I really can't think of what I truly wouldn't do for him.


as far as our one year goes, idk...we wanted to renew our vows and have a big ceremony & party [since we eloped the first time hehe]...but he's still gonna be away with training so we can't then...our anniversary is 2 weeks before Christmas, and he will be home for the holidays, so I'm thinking of planning a surprise wedding ceremony/party...we'll see though

or! since your one year anniversary is paper [haha] i was thinking of booking a photographer to take a whole bunch of pictures of us, or getting a portrait painted of us...since yknow...that's paper [kind of lol]

[Nanijah]

yeah I can see where that would be a good thing also. It's just we're not even on the same level any more lol He's totally not who he was when we got together and he has no plans to try to work on it (or rather he says he can't, it's too late). It's rough, but because we've gone through so much together and been there for each other I think that's what makes it work for us.

No matter what he does, or how he is. I love him, and I always will. When I think of life without him, I can't even imagine what that would be like. It would be scary if I had to live without him in my life. No matter the issues we have to go through.



I wanted to renew our vows for our 10yr. But we had just had our third child and it just wasn't a good time. So I thought maybe 15yrs we can have a big to do since we also just had a small wedding and only 18yrs old not many of our friends came. So that would be nice.

I love the picture idea also! You could write some new vows for each other also and just do it in private over dinner, that would be a good paper gift :o)

You could maybe also make a scrap book of the last year :o) That's kind of paper lol.

[samii so sexii]

^^ Those are good ideas! You've got me brainstorming...

I understand the whole "no matter what..." feeling. I knew that no matter what the circumstance we were always going to be in each other's life...even if it were unofficial. I was willing to be the girl that was just down and didn't care about the title, just wanted the love; and if that meant we had to do our own thing separate from eachother, ok, as long as we respect each other and only give the sidelines 10% of the 100...

sounds really hoodrat-ish of me, but in all honesty...we both just wanted to be around each other in any capacity.

And your situation really brings home the possibility [inevitability] of us changing...we're about to go on this whole military journey together...what if he sees combat? can i really expect him to come home the same person he left as one year later?

idk...