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decent close battle ..
Ink - flow and structure was pretty well done .. expect nothing less from you though as all the pieces you've posted so far do not lack on the flow aspect .. the content however does usually raise issues .. and here it was another sore point .. it wasn't that the verse was dull or boring but it wasn't endearing to me as the reader .. it took too long to really get into what was going on and by then I didn't really care too much about the character and his plight .. there just wasn't enough enjoyment to be had in what you wrote .. the latter stages were more interesting and the whole piece was written well with regards to the scheme/vocab etc. .. I just feel the content needed revising ..
Kid - pretty funny ending even though someone died .. it was a bit 'strange' given the build up showed not real humour on the way to that reasoning .. I have to agree with GL? on the point about your random imagery at times .. but I don't think it 'ruined' it for me .. it was just a bit "huh? whatever (*reads on*)" .. very mild distraction in the read that is forgiveable but something you might want to look at for future verses .. pretty solid overall with a solid flow and a definite grasp of structuring a piece ..
Vote = Kid Phikshen .. basically .. the negative aspect to Kid's verse in terms of content wasn't as hurtful to a verse as Ink's was .. both were well written in terms of what the voter looks for in respect to "mechanics" .. so the content really comes into play here .. Ink just took too long to do anything interesting and never really got me involved with his piece .. whilst Kid's downfall was putting stuff in that didn't really need to be there or never added anything to the read ..
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